Morecambe vs Newcastle United League Cup match banter!

Posted on August 28th, 2013 | 110 Comments |

Morecambe v Newcastle United.
A trip to the seaside for the Magpies this evening.
Venue: Globe Arena, Morecambe.
Date: Weds 28th Aug, 2013.
Kick off: 7.45pm.
Referee: Mark Haywood (West Yorks)
UK TV: None.

Tonight sees the Magpies facing the League Two shrimps of Morecambe in the League and to be honest, I know the square root of buggerall about them!

Usually I would be diligent and do a bit of research but today I was delayed in by an unexpected and very nice dinner at a friend’s in Enfield earlier today so I’m afraid this match banter post will be rather rushed this time.

Usually in a contest between Magpies and Shrimps, there should only be one winner, but with some shock results from lower league sides against Premiership opposition already in this competition, plus Newcastle United’s prodigious talent for turning a drama into a catastrophe, you never knaa!

Newcastle United team news.

Alan Pardew’s Cabaye drivelfest continues unabated but one piece of concrete news in there amongst all the stuff and nonsense was his revelation that French midfield dynamo will not be selected for this evening’s game, the third in a row.

Steven Taylor’s three match suspension for his daft sending off against Manchester City will apply to this game as well, so he’ll definitely be out too.

Loic Remy will be nursing his calf for one more game at least, James Tavernier and Massadio Haidara will also be out and you should know all about Ryan Taylor by now.

On the doubtful list are Mike Williamson, Cheick Tiote and Gabriel Obertan.

Finally, Alan Pardew has already announced that Mapou Yanga Mbiwa will be Capitan, suggesting that Captain Colo will be rested.

I will also be posting the team sheets below very soon!

On the rest, that just leaves my usaual reminder that I shall also be posting highlights and possibly a video of the while match if I can.

Howay the Lads!

ps: And one more thing!

NUFC Blog on metro.co.uk
NUFC Blog on metro.co.uk
As some suggested pre /post match reading, my latest blog on metro.co.uk entitled “Arsenal shots on target 62%, Newcastle United shots on target 6%” has now neen published.

Teams.

Morecambe (4-3-3): Barry Roche (G), Andrew Wright, Andy Parrish, Mark Hughes (C), Tony Diagne, Ryan Williams, Stewart Drummond, Andrew Fleming, Padraig Amond, Jack Sampson, Kevin Ellison

Subs: Andreas Arestidou (G), Robbie Threlfall, Alex Kenyon, Marcus Marshall, Chris McCready, Joe McGee, Joe Mwasile.

Newcastle United (4-2-3-1): Rob Elliot (G), Mathieu Debuchy, Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa (C), Curtis Good, Paul Dummett; Gael Bigirimana, Dan Gosling, Sammy Ameobi, Haris Vuckic, Sylvain Marveaux; Yoan Gouffran.

Subs: Jak Alnwick, Davide Santon, Remie Streete, Vurnon Anita, Moussa Sissoko, Hatem Ben Arfa, Shola Ameobi

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110 Responses

  1. Maybe a hungry team Phisix but its still led by a clueless muppet with no gameplans. Lets hope the team have got an idea or two up their sleeves otherwise Pardwho will be trotting out the same old “Bairns cost us the match” twaddle just as he did after Brighton last season.

    “”I’m a bit aggrieved I can’t put out a stronger team than that because there are young players who gave everything. Unfortunately they shouldn’t be playing for Newcastle in the third round, they should be in our development team. But that’s where we’re at. We didn’t have enough good players on the pitch. That team is a shadow of the team we can put out. We never thought we’d be in this position. We should have brought in one or two more. We’re paying the price.

    “It didn’t help us having to play with 10 men and I don’t think the player helped us either. ‘He looked up at the referee and started rolling around. It was disappointing to see a fellow professional do that. The foul is nothing.

    “The (FA) Cup usually leads only to disappointment because, somewhere along the line, you get knocked out, but my record at Newcastle is awful.

    “I never thought we would be in the situation we are in – I’ve got a united dressing room and I think the spirit is strong, but we need better players out on the pitch.

    “We’re down to the bare bones. We are in a difficult patch at the moment and we are very, very short. I think the board knows that.

    “People talk about players taking responsibility, but that’s a difficult word to quantify. They gave their full effort, but it’s difficult for young players who should be in our development side to produce their best for the first team with everything that’s going on”

    So stand by for more of the same…………….

  2. Or maybe he was “told” to rest everyone else. ;)

    Glad it’s view-able tonight as nothing else to do. A win will set up my birthday nicely tomorrow!

  3. Phisix says:
    August 28, 2013 at 7:26 pm

    “Glad it’s view-able tonight as nothing else to do. A win will set up my birthday nicely tomorrow!”

    Happy Birthday Phisix!

    It was mine yesterday. I started coming out on the 26th but being a lazy sod (and a big bastard), I wasn’t finished until the 27th. They put it down as the 27th on my birth certificate.

  4. You should have said, happy birthday for yesterday mate. Guess we both need a birthday win tonight then.

  5. yeh happy birthday for yesterday worky im sure pardew will give you a great late present……………… curtis good centre back? never mind

  6. We played it from the back then Good hoofed to the running Vuckic. Guess we practice this in training as its what we always do, and no tall players makes no sense.

  7. Phisix says:
    August 28, 2013 at 7:52 pm

    “We played it from the back then Good hoofed to the running Vuckic.”

    I meant that I can’t ever remember seeing Krul or Elliot ever roll it out to one of the defenders rather than just whacking it way up the pitch, usually to set up an opposition counterattack.

  8. I have seen Elliot do it a few times now as well as long ball it. So I guess its just Krul who does it 24/7.

  9. I think we are playing to keep it tight for 70 mins then our superior fitness will become a factor :)

  10. Turned it off watching the celtic game f**k pardew he needs to seriously jump off the tyne bridge

  11. As Peter Reid(monkey’s heed) would say, “Second best all over the f**king park, Men Against boys!”
    Morcambe have cut us to ribbons at times, Alan that’s how you play football!
    A league 2 team are showing us how to pass and move, We look like the lower league team here.
    Absolute disgrace!, And most of our players are puffing and panting, Best training camp ever, If that’s the best, I’d hate to see the worst!

  12. My stream stopped working at 35 mins and I had to download flash player. Did I miss anything?

  13. GS says:
    August 28, 2013 at 8:41 pm

    “My stream stopped working at 35 mins and I had to download flash player.”

    Never download those so called Flash players on the football streams, GS!

  14. I am not sure if we could even beat Alan Pardew’s old team at the moment. Who was it? The Crawley Casuals? The commentator mentioned them on the feed I had.

  15. I didn’t Worky, went to the Adobe site. Thanks for the heads up though because I had done it before and it took an hour to clean up my computer even though I have anti-virus protection.

  16. GS says:
    August 28, 2013 at 8:45 pm

    “I am not sure if we could even beat Alan Pardew’s old team at the moment. Who was it? The Crawley Casuals?”

    Corinthian Casuals, GS. They sound like a tasty football firm who dress in Aquascutum or something like that.

  17. Phisix says:
    August 28, 2013 at 8:50 pm

    “Just realized the game is on skysports 4 HD. Bye bye crappy stream.”

    :lol: It’s been in the corner of all the streams I’ve looked at. Phisix.

  18. Was chatting with Martin O’Neill today at a golf pro am. Asked him if he would take on Pardwitts job and he laughed.

  19. Phisix says:
    August 28, 2013 at 9:15 pm

    “Bennys still eating all those pies then.”

    That reminds me, I have a special tart to cheer me up!

  20. something is very seriously wrong indeed,i worry for our premier league lives.This team would struggle in the bottom half of the championship.

  21. Can’t wait to here the sh1te from pardwitt at the end of the match. “We was good tonight. They was a good team” blah blah blah blah

  22. nitoon says:
    August 28, 2013 at 9:33 pm

    “Can’t wait to here the sh1te from pardwitt at the end of the match.”

    I don’t know which is worse, nitoon, his excuses when we lose or his cockiness when we win.

  23. This means extra games this year. The players will be worn out. Will we be able to cope. Lucky we have real depth in our squad.

  24. workyticket says:
    August 28, 2013 at 9:40 pm

    “I don’t know which is worse, nitoon, his excuses when we lose or his cockiness when we win.”

    Worse than either of these was his blaming the lousy performance in the EPL last season on a successful Europa League campaign – effectively blaming our sh|teness on the one glimmer of hope we’ve had since Jabba dropped him on us.

    Only that cnut would have the nerve to trot out sh|te like that.

  25. There are so many insulting variations of Pardews name and references to his silver bonce that I thought I might offer the ultimate insult – ParDowey.

  26. Bar a up next. Don’t know if I want to watch their boring type of football after that fine display by the toon

  27. GS says:
    August 28, 2013 at 9:52 pm

    “I thought I might offer the ultimate insult – ParDowey.”

    Charlton fans still foam at the mouth and have fits at the mere mention of Pardew’s name, but even they would admit that of anything, Dowie might well be even worse if that’s possible.

  28. GS says:
    August 28, 2013 at 9:58 pm

    “Worky: remember when he said we were on a different level to Everton?”

    Aye but I can’t remember what was his reasoning behind it. They should be the team who are on the closest level to us, ie exactly the same level fighting to get the last European place.

  29. @88: we had a chance, only a slim chance, of that last Champion’s League place if we beat them on the last day of the season. He was puffed up after 6 or 7 wins in 9, but I think the losses were clatterings by Wigan and Spurs. I could be wrong about the exact results but that’s what fed his overconfidence.

  30. I’ve just realised that Peterborough beat Reading 6-0 in this thing. That certainly wasn’t a good night for Nigel Adkins. We got beaten by Liverpool 6-0, but can you imagine getting beaten 6-0 by Peterborough?

  31. We got away with that one, To an extent!
    One moment of quality from Sami Amoebi, And does Shola ever score a goal without an assist on the way in?, He never hits a ball cleanly.

    At least Pardew didn’t make any excuses, And even he had to concede Morcambe had been the better side, For a lot of the match.

    Good tie against Leeds United to come, But less than convincing, And leaves still more questions than answers.

  32. dokky says:
    August 28, 2013 at 10:36 pm

    “@worky the season we got relegated didn’t we get walloped by leyton orient?”

    I was there, dokky. It was a pre season friendly after we got relegated and before we spent our season in the Championship. That was when the big meeting after the game.

  33. Do you think Hughton’s political views had anything to do with Ashley getting rid of him? He did allow the players a big say. Ashley is a right wing dictator and I doubt that once he realized there was a socialist in the midst that it would have taken much persuading to bring in self-made (aggrandising) man Pardew.

  34. Oh ! Shola Ameobi’s, that’s what it’s all about……
    Man. U. apparently have signed Fellaini, so I guess that means McCarthy goes to Everton,
    ah well !
    Always a day late and a dollar short.

  35. GS says:
    August 28, 2013 at 11:07 pm

    “Do you think Hughton’s political views had anything to do with Ashley getting rid of him?”

    He isn’t Leon Trotsky, GS, he’s more like Neil Kinnock, who’s a mate of his incidentally.

  36. There were chants of “Where’s the f**king money”!, And the obligatory, “You Fat Cockney B*****d, Get Out Of Our Club”
    I’m amazed some of these dimbo’s still think Ashley is a Cockney!

  37. Chuck: if we don’t get McCarthy there are others although the only one I have seen mentioned is Thauvin. We don’t really seem to have a list, but maybe someone will arrive out of the blue or we can borrow one of Chelsea’s thousands of mid-fileders.

  38. joe hawkins says:
    August 28, 2013 at 11:26 pm

    “I’m amazed some of these dimbo’s still think Ashley is a Cockney!”

    In fairness, they got the rest of it right.

  39. joe hawkins says:
    August 28, 2013 at 11:26 pm

    “I’m amazed some of these dimbo’s still think Ashley is a Cockney!”

    To some Geordies a “Cockney” is anyone south of Scotch Corner though Joe, or just generally from the South East anyway.

  40. Thauvin is a forward, young and for the most part unproven, though he could turn out to be a phenom., but I don’t think that’s who we should be looking at.
    But it ain’t easy to find the Gareth Bales, apparently Spurs paid around ten million for him, on the other hand how many youngsters have failed to make the grade through the Newcasle academy system in the last five years.
    We have some decent players, mostly French or Francaphone, who came relatively cheap,
    (with Ashley as an owner, no surprise there) however I don’t believe it’s such a good idea.
    Yeah I realise that there are usually more foreign starters on most PL sides, but usually a mixed bag, plus IMO there aught to be at least a small core of home grown players.
    Which raises the question, has the style of football being presently played changed due to the massive influx of foreign imports to a more continental style of play.
    Or have the imported players from various countries adapted to what has always been a faster paced and more physical game played in England and improved the overall game by possibly having better techniques or perhaps now that we have so many imported managers, a better tactical game ?
    Perhaps an interesting subject for a Metro blog ?

  41. Anything to change the constant references to Pardew and the rest, becoming a bit mundane and boring on here lately.

  42. Some of the ignorance that still exists in this Country is staggering.
    A Cockney is anyone born within the sound of Bow Bells, Primarily East London, And the Borough Of Newham, That’s my understanding anyway.
    You do get People from North London lumped in as Cockney, Ie, Chas ‘n’ Dave, But they are from Enfield, In the North.
    I’m not sure about Bermondsey to the south, And the Millwall Dock Area, Which is in close proximity, But i don’t think they are classed as Cockney, But i could be wrong.

  43. joe hawkins says:
    August 29, 2013 at 11:11 am

    “Some of the ignorance that still exists in this Country is staggering.
    A Cockney is anyone born within the sound of Bow Bells, Primarily East London, And the Borough Of Newham, That’s my understanding anyway.”

    Joe, down here in London I have devised my own infallible “Cockney Chicken test ©™”

    If you want to know if someone is or isn’t a genuine “Cockney” get them very flustered, agitated or embarrassed. If their heads start bobbing backwards and forwards like a chicken or a pigeon, then they’re a real Cockney and no mistake, guv’nor!

    It never fails. ;-)

    Here’s “Del Boy” from “Only Fools and Horses” demonstrating the classic “Cockney Chicken” after falling over in a bar.

  44. Worky, That footage is classic, I’ll never forget that, One of the funniest things ever committed to celluloid, By The BBC.

  45. Joe, on the subject of classic BBC comedies, one of the funniest I’ve seen was the Steptoe and Son episode where Harold salavged an old “what the butler saw” machine from an old cinema, and when Harold had a look inside it, he saw his old man as a vintage porn star. You knew exactly what he was going to say to old Albert when he saw it. After a look of withering disgust, contempt and disbelief he said “You dirty old man!” that made it even funnier though.

    Did you ever see that one?