9th - 14th possibleWhat are the permutations for Newcastle United’s finishing position this season?
I am a bit of a geek and the thought of permutations makes me moist with anticipation. I therefore had to inflict said permutations upon NUFCBlog’s readers.
Realistically, we will finish somewhere between 9th and 14th in the Premier League this season.
The fact that a span of 5 places all rests on the final is perhaps an indication of how close things have been outside of the top 6 or so this season.
The matches that affect us this weekend are:
Newcastle v West Brom (obviously) Stoke v Wigan Bolton v Man City
And if we don’t win, the following matches could affect our finishing position too:
Aston Villa v Liverpool West Ham v Sunderland(more…)
Shearer (right)Former Newcastle United number 9 Alan Shearer is shocked that Madam Tussauds waxwork looks just like him.
Madame Tussauds’ sculptors have spent four months creating a carbon copy of Alan Shearer for their waxworks in Blackpool. The man himself went to unveil the waxwork and was suitably impressed, saying:
“I think they’ve done such a great job its scary.
“It’s weird looking at yourself and thinking how incredibly alike it is.
“The figure is so realistic and accurate, the sculpting team have done an amazing job and I hope the public like it too.
“They take a million different measurements of everything and then do the cast which takes a few hours but we did it all in a day in London.(more…)
Richie LargeportionsNewcastle United owner Mike Ashley is the 52nd richest man in the UK.
According to the Sunday Times Rich List, Mike Ashley’s fortune rose by £378m last year giving him a total wealth of £1,268,000,000, which is not to be sniffed at.
The sources of his riches are his stake in Sports Direct and monies received from property deals and dividends. But not Newcastle United.
If it was all in cash and he got just 1% interest that would equate to £12,680,000 before tax every year, which would certainly keep me in Earl Grey tea even at the vast amounts I drink. Although evidently – given Mr Ashley’s £378m increase last year – there are far better places to invest ones money than greedy, good for nothing banks at 1%.
This is good news for Newcastle fans as it means that Mr Ashley will be able to put huge amounts of money into the club to buy players next season and will not be worried about losing a few million here and there. I’m sure Mr Llambias will be chipping in too.
A stunning little numberNewcastle United unveil the new 2011/2012 home kit.
Kevin Nolan is modelling the new home kit for the 2011/2012 season and personally I think it lacks a touch in the stripes department, although in the grand scheme of things I guess it’s not too important compared to what actually happens on the pitch.
Apparently inspiration for the new kit was taken from Kate Middleton’s wedding dress to reflect how royally screwed we’ll be next season if Ashley doesn’t fork out for a couple of decent strikers.
Actually that’s not true. I just made it up.
The keen fashionistas amongst you can pre-order your shirt today and, providing you order by Sunday 15th May, you will receive next season’s kit on the official launch date of Thursday 19th May.
If, however, you’re not a slave to fashion you may – like me – make do with a 5 year old one that has been personalised with various curry and kebab stains. (more…)
Sigmund DalglishKenny Dalglish turns to psychiatry to tell Newcastle United fans what they think about Andy Carroll.
Apparently there’s a royal wedding today. When I heard about it I assumed Cheryl Tweedy was getting hitched again but apparently it’s to do with a couple called Kate and Will. Anyway, it seems my invite was lost in the post so I thought I’d write an article on here instead.
Kenny ‘Sourpuss’ Dalglish has been telling us Toon supporters what we think of Andy Carroll ahead of Sunday’s game, so we’d better jolly well listen.
Kenny instructs us thusly:
“They [that’s us] will do whatever they want, but it won’t take away from what he has done for their football club and it won’t take away what the football club meant to Andy.
“It is a compliment really, in a strange way, if you do get abuse because it means you must have been important to them.”
So any boos for Andy Carroll will actually be translated as “we love you” according to Kenny. I wonder from which Internet site Kenny got his degree in psychiatry. (more…)
