We were not drinking

Posted on March 22nd, 2011 | 89 Comments |

Pretty girl
Totty!
Just more controversy re Newcastle United.

It’s always one thing or another with the Toon. I suppose at least we’re never bored!

Leon Best and Stephen Ireland in trouble for a nightclub event:

“Although we had both been ruled out of the game at Stoke, and didn’t travel with the team, we realise that going out to a bar was inappropriate ahead of Saturday’s game and we fully regret doing so.”

“We were asked to have our photograph taken and we removed our shirts as a tongue-in-cheek joke between friends, but of course the resulting coverage in the press suggests a far different night out. Whilst our actions were wrong, neither of us had consumed alcohol and we were out for only a very short period of time.”

Hmm, I suspect that’s stretching the phrase ‘consumed alcohol’. That’s a bit like saying Jessica Alba is only ‘slightly pretty’ or a lion arriving in your tent at night is only ‘slightly frightening’. I think you get my drift, which I’m sure you don’t.

However, they go on:

“However, with the team having an important game at Stoke the following day, we should never have put ourselves or the club in that position.”

I do wonder what ‘position’ that was. Doggy style?

For various reasons that are too tedious to mention I suspect this will be my last ever blog post, so I’ll leave you with a thought. Whatever happens with the Toon, at least we’re not Spurs!

NUFCBlog Author: Hugh de Payen I'm a baby-boomer of the punk rock persuasion, currently exiled in Somerset for crimes committed in a previous life where locals keep trying to poison me with something called 'scrumpy'. Hates sprouts, coat-hangers, Cilla Black, ornaments, Steven Seagull movies and 50 Cent (he's not worth 10). Hugh de Payen has written 634 articles on this blog.

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89 Responses

  2. I’m not sure I follow your point regarding the word ‘consumed’. When talking about alcohol, or any drink, to consume is to imbibe or somehow injest the liquid. You either do, or you don’t. If you nominalise the verb it is possible to use an adverb, for example ‘heavy consumption’ but this merely denotes the quantity consumed and does not question the act of consumption itself. If they say they didn’t consume alcohol it means no alcohol passed their lips, eyeballs or any other orifice. You are suggesting alcohol WAS consumed, which is a direct accusation of an untruth, which IMHO does not show a great deal of support for the team. If you are correct, and they DID drink alcohol, I still don’t see what the fuss is about. They weren’t going to play and they rarely get the chance to have a Friday night out.

    Enjoy yourselves lads, act responsibly and do the business when you are on the pitch.

  3. If they were not playing, how does it affect the team, with them going out?

    At least were not spurs – ha

  4. Hugh,
    why would this be your last blog post?

    On topic.
    Footballers can do nowt these days without ‘someone’ sending a picture of it to someone with an agenda.

    Deeply sad.

    Hugh,
    mate,
    don’t let people get at ya’ man.

  5. english teacher,
    could it be the difference between: Consumed alcohol & consumed ‘by’ alcohol?

    Bit like the difference between shiteing yourself & tearing your ass?

    :)

  6. Oooooh English Teacher…….. Yawwwwwwwnnnnnn!

    CLiNT seems to clarify the point…. ever so eloquently too!

    And ET and curno…. the point about the concern at them clubbing on a Friday night, is that they’re supposed to be injured and unfit to play!

    Ok, if they went to that place in the expectation it’s a cosy and tranquil retreat where they could sit, relax and read the Times or something tnen fine, by all means

    BUT, it aint such a place izzit and it’s all about Perceptions, that’s what it’s about perceptions.

    Perceptions of lads getting paid a lot of money to play football for Newcastle United, snapped in a place where they could pull more than a hamstring!!!

    I’m sure that the boys and girls who enjoy the environs of such a sporting club as the one they were pictured in would take care of them and make sure that temptation would never present itself to them!

  8. Lesh, sorry to be boring, but the piece made no sense. You do realise that this was reported by Alan Oliver, who was banned from SJP by MA and seems to have some sort of agenda against the club now, a man who’s grip on reality was tenuous to say the least.

    Rio Ferdinand injured himself watching TV, footballers are stupid, accidents happen. If they want to have a red bull in a nightclub on their night off and with no game for three weeks then that’s fine by me. Honestly, Libya has a more relaxed attitude than some people over here.

  9. P.S I realise there were a few grammatical errors in my last post, I’ve been in a bar drinking water and I’m completely out of it.

  10. Cant see what they did wrong myself.
    They weren’t in the squad so why not go out and relax, christ there not priests!

  11. Chr**t what rock did this guy crawl from under (English teacher)he gives a whole new meaning to the word boring.
    And it`s obvious this blog`s going nowhere .
    Seems Enrique`s price is going up day by day, with Beyern, Madrid and our friends on Merseyside and god knows who else, all competing for his services.
    Last price i heard was 13.5 mill.
    Hey the guys a decent player but we could buy two just as good for that kinda dosh, well one and a half maybe!
    We could do a deal with Celtic, apparently they like Forster, so how about selling him plus a few quid for Izaguirre, who by all reports is as good as Enrique and only 25.
    Why is it no one wants to sign a new contract ?
    Is there dissent in the dressing room, has Pardew lost it ?
    Wonder what new tactics he will employ against Wolves, could always go back to the old two three and five lineup.
    One thing about being a Newcastle fan is, the roller coaster ride, we always live in interesting times.

  12. I think saTURDays game showed we need players fit, like Ireland (I’d love to see him start along with Ranger in a new striking formation)…

    So, I fink the boys should be kept in Oxygen tents until then.

  13. Loads have signed new deals chuck,
    the ones that haven’t have been well documented for weeks now mate.
    Although, i know fine well that you know that too.

    So, the word facetious seems apt., hey mate?
    ;)

  14. ‘As they pulled you out of the oxygen tent, you asked for the latest party…’

  15. Clint
    Loads of em eh !
    Like Carroll? ooh! forgot sorry.
    Ermmm! Tiote n`Ben Arfa,n`maybe Ireland ?
    Taylor, Simpson,not bad like, who else ?
    What aboot wor Joey n Jose, our two best players ?
    Guess we wont have to worry as we are going to spend a whole lotta dosh on new faces, come summer eh ?

  16. Anyone remember the film clip of Billy Bremner sitting in the Leeds comunal bath post game, with a tab in one hand and a pint in the other ?

  17. Hey Chuck, do you mean boring as in ‘not interesting’ or boring as in ‘drilling a hole’?

    I was just trying to point out that the original article, and that of Alan Oliver were pointless and banal, and that one of the main points didn’t make sense, making the whole thing null and void.

    It’s people who react to stories like these that perpetuate the whole swell of negativity around football and NUFC in particular. People with, dare I say it, nowt between the ears.

    I’ll crawl back under my boring rock now and get on with my boring life while you play with your exciting brick, or foot, or plastic bottle, or whatever brightly coloured object has caught your attention in the last few seconds.

  18. English teacher
    Sorry i obviously hurt your feelings.
    And yes you are right, have to admit being part and parcel of perpetuating the whole swell of negativity surrounding football and NUFC in particular.
    I`ll try not to be so pointless and banal in future, and just get on with my boring(a hole)life.

    Mea culpa.

  19. english teacher,what was aal that aboot?this is a football blog,not a f**kin’ lecture theatre.
    even your name,could you not come up with something more original than that?.
    or is it to ram home the fact,that well.. your an english teacher,trying to laud it over us mere mortals.
    i bet your wear one of the jackets,with the leather patches on the elbows.
    you dont happen to have a beard by any chance?.

  20. it is a nothing story tbh,there are more important things going on in the world,than a couple of twats showing off their six packs.

  21. Trojan, yes I do have a massive beard, and a jacket (minus the patches). I am an English teacher, but am trained in Psychology, so I’m just engaging in the role schema associated with being a boring twat. The main point was pretty much exactly the same as your second post.

    Nee worries Chuck.

    Keep an eye on FIFA by the way (completely off topic), could be changes afoot, and that would be good news for everybody.

  23. Hmmm! Changes afoot eh! and good news to boot, would it be too nosey to enquire from whence you sniffed out this information ?

  27. He might be a bit arsey, but English Teacher is right.

    This paragraph makes no sense:

    “Hmm, I suspect that’s stretching the phrase ‘consumed alcohol’. That’s a bit like saying Jessica Alba is only ‘slightly pretty’ or a lion arriving in your tent at night is only ‘slightly frightening’. I think you get my drift, which I’m sure you don’t.”

    They said they hadn’t consumed alcohol. It makes no sense to then argue that the euphemism is a bit light for the kind of partying they’d been doing- because they hadn’t had a drink, by their own admission (and I’ll back it up as I was in Tup Tup Palace on Friday night- working I might add).

  29. Hugh de Payen says:
    March 22, 2011 at 7:05 pm

    “Teacher’s Pet. I’m not a profession writer.”

    And “English Teacher” isn’t an English Teacher either, Hugh. If he was, he would have used a possessive apostrophe in his real username. :-)

  30. Hugh, I’d written some appropriate words in praise (well sort of) of English Teacher and his other egos, but they disappeared into the ether. Anyway Hugh your words of wisdom will be missed so get yourself sorted and get back soon.

  31. Ah ah! Gotcha! Working in the club Friday night? Will the real Anal Oliver please stand up!!

  32. For the avoidance of doubt, my last comment was directed at Teacher’s Pet. G’night Stardust.

  33. Christ this bog i mean blog is going down the drain when we are articulating about wor grandma i mean grammar!!

    Lets get back to some hypothesis ; Looked at fixtures…

    Sat
    02-Apr
    Wolves (h) Draw one point !
    Sun
    10-Apr
    4pm
    SKY
    Aston Villa (a) Loss nil points
    Sat
    23-Apr
    Blackpool (a) Draw one point
    Sun
    01-May
    Noon
    ESPN
    Liverpool (a) Loss nil points
    Sat
    07-May
    Birmingham (h) Win three points
    Sat
    14-May
    KO tbc
    Chelsea (a) Loss nil points
    Sun
    22-May
    4pm
    West Brom (h) Win/ Draw 3 or 1 points
    Date
    tbc
    Man United (h
    LOSS NIL POINTS ( MANU PARADING PREM CUP ROOOND POOR OLD SJP UGH !!!)

    So working it all out we will get 8 or 6 points from our remainder games, currently we are on 36 , so 42 points should be good enough, since we were relegated two seasons ago with only 38 punts, I think , any thought fellow bloggers , sorry aboot me apostrophes !!

  34. Hugh…last write up?? Not sure on your reasons mate but whatever it is just want to say you’ve done a good job so far. I never agreed with u all the time but it was nice to bitch it out in the blog. Good luck to u.

    As for the lads out in town (NOT) drinking….seriously why should the public care. Even some waiter has come out saying they only drank water n red bull and leaving early. Give it a rest lads. Fishbowl syndrome anyone??

  35. Good post, English Teacher. Most interesting comments I’ve read on here for ages.

  36. For heck’s sake brisvegas @35, don’t say things like that, his egos are puffed up enough.

    Teacher of english? Trained psychologist? Are there no limits to his delusions of grandieur?

  37. Two wins /6 points will be enough. If we don’t succeed then the team belongs to championship.

  38. @ 37
    FinMag79

    HA. Because we are good enough to get 3 pts at this moment it time!!

    Championship is where we belong. It will be until the club sorts itself.

    FACT.

  39. Oh dear,
    the doom has well & truly set in.

    ‘What a difference a loss makes…’

  40. Doom and gloom because something seems to have happened in the last month within the camp. Something doesntt seem right. Players don’t seem as happy, and the communication on the pitch seems to be missing.

    …call it a feeling in my bones, but I honestly think we could be in the mix now until the end of season. Its 2 years ago… AGAIN.

  41. The players obviously don’t want to play for Pardew.
    Thy truth is now beginning to show. Some people went mental having a go at anyone who criticised Pardew. This blog and Worky were especially singled out for abuse.
    Could it be that Worky was right? The.attitude of the players seems to indicate this.
    Where are Pardew defenders now?

  42. Nowt so sure as
    ‘Self fulfilling prophecies’ mate.
    It’ll quickly transpose onto the pitch.
    Always does!

  43. I think its obvious that the sale of Andy Carroll has effected the team more than we thought. Now the contracts of other key players such as Barton an Enrique are in limbo, its just got to effect how they fit together as a team.

  44. Could the apparent loss in commitment and cohesion stem from Pard’s recent ultimatum to the players – those that don’t show’ll go!

    It was hardly the most inspirational piece of man-management! Could he be wielding a heavy hand and seeing it back-fire?

  45. Micky Toon says:
    March 23, 2011 at 3:52 pm

    “The players obviously don’t want to play for Pardew.”

    Micky, perhaps they don’t know what to do for Pardew, as he seems to say one thing one minute, and another the next. He also spills everything into the public domain when an “experienced” manager like himself should know that some things are better being kept behind closed doors.

  46. well we have seen this kind of thing happen before,at this club and other clubs.
    when a group of players play for one manager,and not another.
    steve claridge once said on this very situation in question;”it’s not that players are not trying,it’s probably because thet dont not believe in the system,they are being asked to play.
    in the case of pardew,he’s been all wrong for us from day one,for the impact he’s had,it was a waste of time sacking hughton.he may make his substitutions earlier,but some of his tactics of late,have been shocking.
    i know some of this will be down to injuries,suspensions etc,but playing players out of position,is a recipe for disaster.
    people will say get behind him,but he’s just another cog in the ashley propaganda machine,and the fans will never take to him,and it’s not because he’s from london.
    the whole top and bottom of it is,alan pardew is an utterly average manager at best,and after chris was sacked,this is in no way a step up.
    there was never going to be any feel good factor appointing a man of this calibre,martin allen got the barnet job today,alan pardew should be there,that’s about his level.
    so it’s a case of more doom and gloom,because of ashley’s cheap arsery and meddling,mike ashley could make a hyena cry.

  48. CLiNT FLiCK says:
    March 23, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    “Either that or we all over-bastard-react when ever we lose.”

    Clint, I always felt the same way about the managerial change, whether we were beating Liverpool, or losing to Stoke.

  49. worky,
    aye i know mate, it wasn’t directed towards you mate.

    More, all & sundry.

    :)

    ;)

  51. Cheers Munich,

    Likewise brother.

    Keep the faith, as if you needed any encouragement mate.

    Howay the Lads!

    ;)

  53. Munich Mag says:
    March 23, 2011 at 10:02 pm

    “Clint…look slike me and you are keeping this blog rolling mate…”

    Munich, we’re on a bit of a semi break owing to a few things hapenning recently. Won’t last forever though.

  54. worky…good to hear mate…match days are another kettle of fish too, much more going on…

  55. My take on recent events is that despite saying the club have everything to play for, they have all started to coast through and Pardew hasnt helped by tinkering with the team and formations despite us needing to be safe first.
    But the biggest problem is how weak we are up front, its time for Nolan to play off a front man and dont play Shola, he is average when fully fit and bloody awful when not, get him out of the firing line as he is a passenger along with Lovenkrands.

  56. Has this blog DIED this week along with the team ! One thing I will say is , Best and Ireland , what message are you sending to the youngsters of the team !
    By May you can all put yer feet up bugger off to Portugal or wherever your luxury hideaway is an forget all aboot the Toon who pay yer bleedin wages , all we ask WASTERS is give us 2 months more solid effort till then for the sake of the whole squad !!

    KTF ///

  57. nzedtoonman says:
    March 24, 2011 at 7:30 pm

    “Has this blog DIED this week along with the team !”

    nzed, as I mentioned to munich, Hugh and I have had a few things going on in our own lives recently and need to take a bit of a break from the ‘blog for a short while. We’ll be back though.

  58. Aye,
    sorry to all concerned from me too, please accept my apologies with regard the upkeep of the blog.
    I’ve a lot of ‘stuff’ going on in my ‘day to day’ & something had to give.
    Luckily, football is on yet another break atm, so for the blog to ‘kinda’ go on hold too isn’t the end of the world & rest assured i will be back contributing soon.

    I thank you,

    & now back to your regularly scheduled program.

  59. fair do’s boys – I’m sure when that Wolves match starts to loom on the horizon (a MUST WIN) – Or Ireland is caught bare knuckle fighting an overcharging ladyboy – then i’m sure The Boys’ll be Back In Toon.

    Howay till then

  60. Big Deal two injured players went out on the lash….get back in your box Partridge you irritating little Prick :lol:
    He is Really starting to Grate on me.

  61. Sir jason why did it take you so long to be irritated by Pardew?He is completley out of his depth ,but unfortunately he thinks he is Gods gift to football management.

  62. It’s only recently I have been paying attention but never liked him from day one so blanked him out and avoided reading his baloney and drivel.
    Grateful manager,will do as MA says, job for the boys and yup his scores on the doors are starting to look pretty bad to say the least.

    Give us a break Partridge your big mouth and big manager stance is wearing thin,so win some games or get back in the Gimp box.

  63. Stop slagging Pardew, give the bloke a break, he took on a difficult job, well done to the lad for helping us out I say.

  64. Slagging Pardonwho is surely de-rigeur? He’s The Management and fans are thusly entitled to slag him off for wharever and variously reasons; it’s part of the job.

    Whether one considers him a mouthy southern ba5tard or a skillful man-manager, as a fan you can say what you bloddy want and still be right.

    Or wrong.

    Or possibly drunk after a night of not consuming alchohol.

    Come tomorrow, you’ll not have to apologise for being crap to anyone but your missus.

    Mind you, you aren’t on mega-bucks. One assumes.

    I thank you.

  65. Is this blog finished or what ?
    Munich mag slagging everybody else is what the fans are good at.
    Kilgore you talk some crap.

  66. Kilgore_D_Sprout there are some people on here who should help worky out, to get some crack going..not just winging all the time mate…

    Personal opinion is allowed of course, Pardew is probably somewhere between a “mouthy southern ba5tard or a skillful man-manager”…but the majority on here seem to hate the guy…perhaps he actually deserves it…but as you say, it’s up to each individual to form there own opinion..

  67. “Kilgore you talk some crap.”

    At least I get paid for it: you seem to do it for free.

  69. Maybe he gets paid to whinge aswell.
    Munich where is everyone hiding there used to be a load on here lastyear ?

  70. How Munich & Kilgore,
    alreet.

    I did submit a post last night but i’m not aux fais with the protocol for getting it up here.
    So, if ya’ out there worky?

    ;)

  71. toonrus,
    a bit of a sabbatical going on mate.
    We’ll be back soon man.
    Seems like a good time, with no football happening right now.
    ;)

  72. Good to see Perch got his 3 match ban over turned.
    It sounded like he didn’t deserve the red card in the first place after retaliating to being attacked off the ball in a last reserve game.
    Wonder if he can serve the ban as a reserve game?
    Anyone know?

  73. toonrus and Clint…don’t know whats up lads…but pretty deasville on here at the mo…

    Things’ll hopefully pick up when the lads play next weekend…I mean, thats what it’s all about anyway…get the crack going…

  74. Clint…the majority of posters sem to think it’s better when Perch is banned for three games…opinion of him is not too high !!…

  75. Clint hows you doing longtime no speak, it seems the blog has changed a lot from i was on before.
    Whats happened to Toonsie is he not here anymore ?
    Munich i think Perch is a bit dodgy at the best of times

  76. Munich,
    i was gonna have a dig at the ‘Perch is crap anyway’ thing, but pulled back.

    Like most players playing their first season in the prem, he’s trying to find his feet.
    But Toon fans aren’t known for their magnanimity when it comes to allowing players time to settle.
    I remember people squealing like stuck pigs about Barton, Colo, Jose to name a few in the last year.
    Sad sacks!
    :)

  77. toonrus,
    toonsy’s effed off to make his own blog mate & took some bloggers with him.
    We over here are just going through a transitional stage, whilst there’s no football being played.
    Hugh, who’s been writing, isn’t very well & has had to take it EZ.
    Don’t think worky’s been having a very good time of it recently either, both medically & otherwise.
    I’ve been writing some posts too, but i don’t really know how put the bastards up myself.
    Also, i’ve been having a few ‘things’ gannen on in me life too.
    So all this has clashed at once, so the blog has kinda stood still a bit for a few days.
    Don’t worry though mate, it’ll pass soon, & we’ll be back at it, when there’s some real football.
    Ta for asking though.
    ;)

  78. CLiNT FLiCK says:
    March 25, 2011 at 8:54 pm

    “toonsy’s effed off to make his own blog mate & took some bloggers with him”

    I didn’t “eff off” and I never “took” anyone with me.

  79. toonsy,
    a figure of speech mate.

    You tell(explain) him then.

    I was just breaking it down to the vernacular, soz like.

    Nee offense meant.

    ;)

  80. Clint thats a bit shit m8 hope you get things sorted. So Toonsie’s has his own blog now, whats it called called ?

  81. Toonrus,
    divn’t fret marra, we’re working on it, we ain’t gone, just realigning our shit.

    toonsy’s is listed up the page on the right, i think it’s the blog.co.uk one.

    ;)

  82. CLiNT – Nee worries.

    Basically I decided to give it a go myself. I spent a lot of time writing on here so thought that I’d see if I could go it alone kind of thing.

    Toonrus – I’ll not put the link up, but if you really want to have a look you can click my blue name :)

  85. Toonrus – How are you mate? I’m not bad. Busy, but not bad.

    Currently I’m changing jobs but other than that I’ve been working like mad, having Cancer trouble, having wife issues, having to deal with bereavement but other than that I’m fine bud :)

  89. “But Toon fans aren’t known for their magnanimity when it comes to allowing players time to settle….”

    Clint…from my recollection, the toon fans have always liked a tryer, but over the course of the last 5 years or so the fans have beome hyper critical in many issues, players settling in being one of them…the rest of the negativity is down to the roller coaster ride of ownership change, relegation, Andy Carroll sale etc…

    The fans are suffering from the results of several bizzare decisions over the last years. But one thing is for sure, the fans are all united in the love of the Toon….we all know from experience that unfortunately being a toon fan is invariably a bumpy ride…it aint gonna get any easier any time soon !!…welcome to the goldfish bowl…!