Pardew: The man who can’t get a grip on getting a grip

Posted on October 7th, 2013 | 26 Comments |

Alan Pardew as Corporal Jones in "Dad's Army."
DONT PANIC! DONT PANIC!
Ladies and Gentlemen, my latest post on metro.co.uk is now up!

Entitled “Newcastle United’s Alan Pardew needs to get a grip on himself before his team will” it reflects on some of Pardew’s comments made after the game, where he said:

“We have got a side that needs to get a grip of a game,” then adding later:

“We’re one of those teams who are going to need to keep on our toes because we know we can drop a few levels quite quickly, but we hit a level today which was, perhaps, as good as I’ve seen, and that’s what we’re going to have to try and replicate for ninety minutes if we can.”

Though Pardew is undoubtedly correct in his assessment, I found it strange that he should raise the issue as if it had nothing to do with himself with his repeated switches to negative tactics whenever the Magpies go a goal or two in front, with the team often going from a position of dominance at half time, to either holding on desperately, or throwing away their early advantage with Pardew either running around his dugout area like Corporal Jones from ‘Dad’s Army,’ or doodling in his notepad.

But you can read all about it there!

“Newcastle United’s Alan Pardew needs to get a grip on himself before his team will”

Alan Pardew’s post match interview after the Cardiff City game.

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Comment on this post

26 Responses

  1. Dokky, if you are reading this, I might have forgotten to wish you a happy birthday on Saturday because I was deein’ all the blog stuff for the match.

    If I did, happy birthday and I hope you had a great time!

  3. This could and probably will be Pardew’s last shot at PL football and he obviously wants to prolong it as long as possible.

    With a seven year contract or at least seven years pay due, which puts him in the cat bird seat and he’s not figuring on moving.

    Just shows how dumb Ashley is, in giving him an unprecedented contract on the word of that idiot Llambias.

    As things stand there’s no need to fire him, as we are not threatened by relegation, yet.

    And who knows, Ashley may still believe his delusive rambling’s, after all, there are those on here who still do.

    It’s becoming a ridicules saga that hopefully will end soon, but it’s up to Ashley, who in fact may earn a bit of goodwill by doing the right thing, but it’s just such a long learning curve for him and he may never get it.
    Ah well !

  4. If I didn’t want to change manager midseason and pay off a long contract, I would at least hire a decent first team coach. Aren’t the ones that Man U let go still out of work?

    You limit Pardews role even further. Let him do his thing for the media, as he seems to like that.

    Of course Pardew would still lose us a few games with stupid selections and substitutions, but I could put up with that as the top six are miles ahead in terms of money anyway.

    If you are not going to sack him, at least get him someone who can set up the defense and explain to Ben Arfa what is expected of him given the particular side we are playing against (he looked lost against Everton).

  5. Here, I’m saying nowt lol.
    He is definitely a man under pressure, He got some much needed respite with the win.
    He will be flying high one minute, But the Red Scouser’s game, Could bring him crashing down again, And under the microscope.
    I think he knows himself now, The lie of the land, And the pressure of this job.
    He more or less said, He has to cut himself off from the criticism, And just focus on the next game.
    Well at least he is not Howard Wilkinson, He is the original cure for insomnia!

  6. Aye Joe but a victory against the vagrants would keep him hanging in there, especially as it’s the vagrants. If he loses that one though, the ship is sinking.

  8. @ workyticket
    lmao bud, theres more chance of a pig, flying past me living room window, than jfk telling the truth on kebab gate

  9. and the last thing we need to jfk flaping his laughing gear at the press again so sssssshhhhhh mr caybeye

  10. Did I miss something here, what is “kebabgate” and what has Joe got to do with it ?
    Unbelievable, you could make a tv series about this club, (a poor one, full of gossip and machiavellian schemes)and very little football.

  11. Hey Workey,

    Contacted Ticket Office re ticket for next years everton game !

    They said that because I was coming from so Far – NZ , that they would treat me to two tickets for me and my 7 year old as I was a long time supporter and the distance I travelled ! Mr Ashley could afford it they said !

    Nice eh ?

    Nzedd

  12. @nzedtoonman – hmmm if they’re giving away free tickets I might give them a ring myself and get them to send tickets to my friend in Wellington who can then send them back to me

  13. I’m torn on the whole Pardew thing – I think he’s a bit of a muppet and a very average manager. If we sack him we know Kinnear will become interim manager until Fatty can find another fall guy willing to take low basic wages (for a prem manager), have no say in signings other than recommending players to Kinnear and basically being a yes man

  14. 10 chuck says:
    October 8, 2013 at 5:44 am
    ‘Did I miss something here, what is “kebabgate” and what has Joe got to do with it ?’

    chuck – Kebabgate refers to when JFK called Cabaye, Kebab. It wasn’t that long ago mate.

  15. pete_toon says:
    October 8, 2013 at 9:39 am

    “chuck – Kebabgate refers to when JFK called Cabaye, Kebab. It wasn’t that long ago mate.”

    Pete I was referring to Cabaye’s latest comments in his interview with the French squad. I read the whole interview in the original French and it seems I was right at the time. Things weren’t what they seemed and Cabaye has now challenged Joe “deep throat” Kinnear to reveal the truth as he won’t / can’t.

    Here are some extracts from what he said, but I’ll write about it later:

    “The State of mind of the fans was born from what the club wanted to pass…” (Which is what I said at the time)

    and another excerpt:

    “The only person who could explain everything is Joe Kinnear. If he is honest, he says. Otherwise, it won’t come out of my mouth.”

  17. nzedtoonman says:
    October 8, 2013 at 8:22 am

    “Hey Workey,

    “Contacted Ticket Office re ticket for next years everton game !

    “They said that because I was coming from so Far – NZ , that they would treat me to two tickets for me and my 7 year old as I was a long time supporter and the distance I travelled ! Mr Ashley could afford it they said ! ”

    Nice one, NZed, you’ve obviously got the right person in the ticket office there! Divven’t tell Ashley though or his heed will probably explode if he knows someone’s been giving free tickets away! :-)

  19. yeah , it was nice !

    BUT I was only feckin joking told me to wait in line like all of us jokers ! The lady in SJP was positively rude ! She said actually we have fans as far as Australia coming to watch ! I said ACTUALLY New Zealand is 3000 km further ! She said get in line buster ! Nice !

    Sorry for the subterfuge thought it might appeal but it nivva happened !! Got to get me mastercard oot !

    HTFL !

  20. stevep

    giz yer mates details in welly ! and I’ll send him some abuse toon styley cheeaz

  22. after the 3-2 at everton i thought they would have to give them away instead of selling them !

    Mind you watched the goals in Sky sports goal of the week award !

    Cannnot believe Loic’s first was not in the old candidates ??

    Why – we not a popular club anymore, took it from halfway line beat a couple of players and PRECISE finish ! Top drawer , sorry should I be talking aboot this keebabgate !

  23. I wonder if Cabaye is playing along to set up a January move?, I think someone is going to get sold to fund Joe’s shopping spree.
    Especially after Pardew has said the magic words, “We cannot always rely on Cabaye, And he won’t always be there”, Does that portent anything?
    That may now give them the excuse they need to punt him on, Citing he broke club protcol, Or some other bull!
    Worky, If Pardew beats the Red Scouser’s, He will not get through the door, Such will be the size of his head?
    In true Pardew style, He will live of the back of that one, For a considerable period of time!

  25. pete_toon says:
    October 8, 2013 at 12:05 pm

    “Blimey worky. That’s some interview there. Sadly, JFK will never admit the truth.”

    Can we handle the truth, Pete?

    Is it like Carrollgate, Bartongate and all the other ‘gates’ at Newcastle United, the club built on lies?

    We need Woodward and Bernstein to investigate this one, or Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman! :-)

  26. I’ve added a new poll. “Do you think that Alan Pardew and Newcastle United misled fans over Yohan Cabaye’s alleged ‘strike’ earlier in the season?”

    There’s a story on the way too.