The madness of Alan Pardew and the Three Stooges in Nice

Posted on August 21st, 2013 | 65 Comments |

NUFC Blog on
NUFC Blog on
My two latest blogs for are now up!

The first one, entitled “Pardew – Is he deluded to the point of insanity?” takes a look at some of the talking points from Monday evening’s game with Manchester City. Talking points such as the gossip surrounding Yohan Cabaye and not least, something all we Newcastle United fans have become wearily familiar with, Alan Pardew’s total lack of a grip on reality in his post-match assessment of games.

The second one is called “Were Newcastle’s ‘Three Stooges’ in Nice to sell Cabaye or buy Cvitanich?” (The sub-editor changed the original title so don’t blame me!). Basically, it is my ruminations on what Newcastle United’s “Three Stooges,” Alan Pardew, Joe Kinnear and Graham Carr might have been doing at Nice airport, where they were spotted and photographed by a Northumbria University student and Toon fan who calls himself “Sewelly” on Twitta.

Hope you like them!

Pardew – Is he deluded to the point of insanity?

Were Newcastle’s ‘Three Stooges’ in Nice to sell Cabaye or buy Cvitanich?


I have now added the photos of the Three Stooges Pardew, Kinnear and Carr at Nice airport below. Thanks to “Sewelly” for these.

Pardew, Kinnear and Carr.
Pardew, Kinnear and Carr. at Nice Airport.


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NUFCBlog Author: workyticket workyticket has written 1092 articles on this blog.

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65 Responses

  1. How come we are the only club with a BILLIONAIRE chairman who would rather shit himself rather than put a penny in the slot. Miserly bastard.!!!

  2. Porciestreet; says:
    August 21, 2013 at 8:09 pm

    “How come we are the only club with a BILLIONAIRE chairman who would rather shit himself rather than put a penny in the slot. Miserly bastard.!!!”

    Not quite, Porciestreet. Malaga were taken over by a billioniare Sheikh who’s been as tight as a gnat’s chuff. They were actually banned from European competition for a two years (later reduced to one) for debt!

  3. Bet he didn’t deliberately shit himself though. !
    Got to say that I have never been so down and disillusioned about our situation as I am this season. In 55 years of absolute passion for the team, this is my lowest ebb, to the point where I really don’t care if I miss the game or not.(and I never miss)
    Ive stood in the tunnel at KO, shared a joke with MOTD camera lads, had coffee with the girls who did the laundry and stood blathering with Benny Craig and Jackie milburn in the med room and you would think I would never give up my love for the team, but these bastards have done for me and I’m sure there’s a lot more vlike me. So sad !

  4. Aye Porciestreet. I’ve supported the team with managers like Ossie Ardiles and Jim Smith in the lower divisions, seen players like Pedro, Waddle and Gazza develop and get sold on etc… seen a half full SJP on a wet Wednesday night and STILL, I’ve never been as disillusioned as I am now. It isn’t just the football (see above), it’s the odious Ashley, the odious Llambias (I know he’s gone but nonetheless), the Stadium name, the Sports Direct signs giving me a fit when I’m trying to watch a game, constantly having my intelligence insulted with bullshit, now there’s friggin’ Wronga with the name of the club being dragged even deeper through the mire. Watching fans turn on each other because Ashley’s lies and confidence tricks are so divisive…

  5. I’m really pleased that I now live in Cyprus and can’t get to the games as I’m sure i would be sorely tempted.
    A mate that I drink with who’s a bedlinton lad, is 48 and had a season ticket since he was 18 and is about to give it up. It’s a real dumb state of affairs.
    I think the only solution to this is for Ashley to go. Iv’e never thought that protesting is a sensible way to go about things as “it damages the team” but lets face it the team is damaged considerably already.
    A couple more duff results and the silver one gets the bullet. Ashley then goes off on a scouting trip to africa and is captured by Somali pirates and is never seen again. You couldn’t write this shit but you know, It MIGHT just work.!!! Howaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay the Lads.

  6. The only way to affect change is with the purse strings. If you want ashley out, don’t send a penny his way. I’ve stopped buying shirts (though even if I liked ashley there’s no way in hell I’d ever buy one with wonga or any of its ilk plastered on it) and that’s the only way they were making money off of me anyways. If the club had to truly do a Leeds to be rid of him, I’d be happy to see it happen. I’m happy to take the long view on this one.

  7. The rot is very deep. I think Pardew has become paranoid, especially after Monday’s thrashing. Cabaye wants out, his French team mates must be feeling the disillusionment within the club; Kinnear has been found out and doubtless equally rejected by Ashley who has now lost his former sidekick, by his own hand, in Llambias. It’s a total, total mess without any easy resolution. Ashley can’t sell without a massive loss – which I don’t think he can stand, hence his staying with Pardew to save 8 million quid. Kinnear is totally out of his depth and should never have been returned to any position within the club; Pardew is clutching 8 million with one hand and humiliation in the other. I am sure Big Sam is licking his lips for the kill at the weekend. If I was to see a solution, it would be for Ashley to submit, acknowledge that he hasn’t got a clue at how to run a club, recognize that Pardew is a walking disaster and look around for the best possible proven manager at any price and pay the man to come in and start playing proper football with the talent we have, despite it all, managed to assemble.

  8. What happened to the separate posts yesterday worky? I know I’m getting addled, but I could have sworn I commented on the idea of Pard’s and co being in Nice to see Lyon players as being a load of codswallop. Was I just imagining it? Have I now got Alzheimer’s?

  9. The problem is that most of us on this blog have watched NUFC for a long time and we know there is talent in this team. It is not like we are playing with 11 Amdy Fayes.

    I have read a couple of the other blogs (Ed’s and Toonsy’s) and everybody is in agreement that Pardew has to go (except Troy :) ). You really want to grab Pards by the collar and shake him and say “did you see what I just saw”. He doesn’t seem to have a grasp on reality.

  10. My last comment went to moderation. I have no idea why, unless I am barred for being nasty about the ex-pope.

  11. He is asking for patience in Today’s Chronic, And to judge them after the two home games, Against West Ham and Fulham.
    What about the last three home games of last season, And then a crap pre-season, Where we played opposition, That was neither use nor ornament.
    A continuing disaster of a transfer window, Which is only this way, Because our owner is a greedy git.
    Virtually the same squad taking to the field, Who got us into trouble in the first place, And rolled over in the same manner they did last season.
    Okay it was Man City, With all their millions, But the manner of the defeat spoke volumes.

    After all the crap he has put the fans through, He is still asking for another chance, He has some front, You have to give the idiot that!
    Sometimes you have to stand back from a situation, And have a good look at it.
    He has to realise that he is finished here, There is nowhere else for him to go, And he has went as far as he can.
    He should just be man enough to admit it to himself, And Ashley should swallow his pride, And boot him out.
    I would think more of him, If he fell on his sword, Because this is getting beyond a joke now!

    They can sit on as many yachts, And have transfer summits, Until the cows come home, It’s not going to make one bit of difference!
    The manager is well past his sell by date, And indulging him further, Is a waste of time, And nothing is going to change!

  12. At some point you have to say enough is enough and draw a line in the sand.
    For me it is the Joe Kinnear appointment.
    After 27yr with a season tticket in the south east gallowgate I have sacked it off. Gutted at myself. Ifeel ssorry for the good lads still it the club and playin ffor the team but Ioonly have one way to voice my anger/apathy at the owners and that’s my wallet.
    I honestly cannot slag the regime off but still support the regime any longer. In my own small way I must be true to myself and my principles. I’m going to the Harper testimonial for his sake bur will be quite emotional for other reasons. I sent my season ticket to Ashley with a strongly worded letter but I am under no illusion that I’ll so much as get a reply after all these years of paying towards the club.
    Sorry lads.

  13. Yes we can hark back to the days of Gordon Mckeag, And i too remember cold Wednesday nights in the Gallowgate, P***ing with snow, And everyone singing, “Where’s wha roof”?

    Mckeag and Co were a bunch of cnuts, But they didn’t have the money Ashley has, So what’s his excuse?
    It only makes the current status quo, All the more harder to swallow!

  14. Ashley said a couple of years back, “This Is The New Newcastle”, No Mike, I think you will find, This is the old Newcastle.
    The one i had to put up with and endure, As a young lad!

  15. Here’s a quote from talksport(shite):

    “Former Newcastle United defender Steve Howey believes that Alan Pardew is being made a mockery of by the club, talkSPORT reports.

    The Magpies lack of strength in depth was highlighted by a rampant Manchester City on Monday as the runners up romped to a 4-0 victory, and fans have already begun to question whether the club can stand by their vow to improve on last term’s 16th place finish – especially after such a quiet transfer window.”

    Rather, I think Pardew is making a mockery of the club. F@ck off Howey, how can you possibly blame a “lack of strength in depth” it was the first game of the season? We are a one man team now, if Cabaye “gets his head turned” we are shite??? We have a whole team of internationals.

    It is not like we have 11 Graham Oates :)

  16. @Clint magnum,comments like yours echoed by many,the people who pay money so that our source of enjoyment,and entertainment can pi@& all over us we speak they dont care,someone suggested on this blog that Ashley would rather get rid of the true fans who will not support this only fools n horses rag n bone man regime,and replace them with the fans who swap club loyalties like shirts,those arsenal fans who only are because they done the double,Chelsea fans because they won the league,Newcastle fans because we got Ben afro…you see my point,,real nufc fans care about the club the city the people.Ashley must be depressed,because it seems he cares about nothing.

  17. worky

    can’t imagine puma being ower the knock aboot wonga being slapped across the front of their shirts mind.

    sales could be down by fatmans fav number – 70% ??

  18. A lot of those who post on The Chronic, Are now calling Pardew, “Mavis”, I think that is very fitting, “Oh well i don’t really know Mike, How to set a team up”.
    You could also say he’s a bit of Derek Wilton, Thrown in for good measure lol.

  19. Anyone know where season ticket sales stand this season? To echo some of your sentiments, my Dad has not renewed his seat this season, 1st time in many years, but wasn’t sure how much of a pattern that was?

    He did mention a 3-year-season ticket deal was done, so maybe people still have a year or two on their deal remaining….?

    That’s prob why they did it, knowing tough times were ahead!

  20. roy cropper says:
    August 22, 2013 at 11:15 am

    “sales could be down by fatmans fav number – 70% ??”

    Roy, we’ll get a rough idea on Saturday in the first home game.

    There’s also the full Wronga half time experience to look forward too as well. One of their new half time pursuits is called “Straight walking football” where “two fans will race head to head through a course packed with obstacles to test their balance and skill. Whoever keeps their cool and finishes past Teenie and Tynie will take home £150” (Got that quote from the Hearts website)

  21. Milner says:
    August 22, 2013 at 11:57 am

    “Anyone know where season ticket sales stand this season?”

    Judging by the amount the club are having to push them I would say not brilliant, Milner. Hardly anyone knows the exact figures right now though.

  22. Can you confirm the £30k donation to Thomson House, from the loan sharks, actually happened WT ? Just asked the question on the Chronicle Live site !

  23. “There’s also the full Wronga half time experience to look forward too as well. One of their new half time pursuits is called “Straight walking football” where “two fans will race head to head through a course packed with obstacles to test their balance and skill. Whoever keeps their cool and finishes past Teenie and Tynie will take home £150″

    Presumably via a pay day loan ?

  24. Gave up my ticket relegation year.My son and grandsons have joined me this year.That is with no pressure from me.The judge us after the WHU and Fulham games statement shows how much Pathetic Pardew needs a reality check.
    He needn’t worry he will be judged by the last of the “Give him a chance to turn it around” “Stability” and “Pure waiting for a miracle” brigades.Surely Ashley will then have to see he will lose the thing he loves most of all Money!

  25. I renewed my ticket this year (direct-debit scheme), but I won’t be next season unless the management structure radically changes for the better. Of course, the whole JFK thing kicked off after the renewal deadline.

  26. AndyMac says:
    August 22, 2013 at 1:47 pm

    “Can you confirm the £30k donation to Thomson House, from the loan sharks, actually happened WT ?”

    Andy, that would be too obvious, they’re more clever than that. Wronga have ponied up £30,000 for the Chronic’s “Wish Sport” appeal and in return, the Chronic gets higher sales with people collecting tokens (available only in the Chronic)

    From Tuesday, July 16 The Chronicle will start printing tokens in paper everyday for just over eight weeks. Simply cut out these tokens and collect as many as you can for the group you wish to support. Then either pass them onto your group leader, or post them to the group using the address provided on this website.”

    The Chronic will probably make more than £30,000 in extra sales. One thing that is sure is that it has affected the Chronic’s coverage of Wronga, for instance, no one at the Chronic may refer to Wronga as a “payday lender” anymore, it now has to be “Digital Finance Company” now in all instances.

    From one of my previous blogs (and with thanks to Mark Brophy)

    “Since the latest appeal was announced on the 1st July, the Chronicle’s coverage of Wonga has changed markedly. For instance, as fellow blogger Mark Brophy pointed out in his ‘blog, “Wonga’s easy ride at the Chronicle” and “Local press criticism of Wonga just got more unlikely” the Chronicle’s last reference to Wonga as a “payday lender” occurred only three days after the abovementioned announcement on July 4th. From now on, journalists at the Chronicle may only refer to Wonga as a “Digital Finance Company,” and will have to give them a very easy ride generally. Like Mark Brophy, I’m checking. Getting back to the programme though, the editor of the Chronicle, Darren Thwaites, refused to be interviewed on the matter.”

  27. Andy, just look at the headings in that Chronic story

    “Fans grateful to Wonga for showing up”

    “The club say Wonga makes Newcastle United stronger”

    “Wonga face up to questioning”

    Every single quote under those heading was gushing about Wonga. NOT ONE of the words from the anti Wronga people there such as Chi Onwurah or the representative from the Citizen’s Advice Bureau was quoted. It’s as if they weren’t there.

  28. So be prepared for even more fawning from both local rags in the next few months. Who says you cant buy the press in this country ?

  29. So, Pards has now presided over two of the biggest capitulations I have ever seen – Liverpool and Citeh. Add to that Spurs and Wigan away.

    Even relegation teams don’t get tonked as badly as we have. Our best recent result was a dismal display against a woeful QPR.


  30. Two things:

    1. You’ve insulted the Three Stooges (two of which were from my home town); they were entertaining and quite possibly knew more about football than these guys.

    2. Swansea are sure making that whole Europa League qualifying thing look relatively easy.

  31. tunyc says:
    August 22, 2013 at 9:43 pm

    “Two things:

    1. You’ve insulted the Three Stooges (two of which were from my home town); they were entertaining and quite possibly knew more about football than these guys.”

    Aye tunyc, but I also insulted Tyneside’s greatest ever funnyman and his fat American mate when I compared Ashley and Llambias with Laurel and Hardy too.

  32. “Boiled eggs and nuts”. I don’t think people know them as much over here because they weren’t shown as much. I think the BBC only had about 2 quid to spend on kid’s TV. ITV had more but spent it on Cheggers.

  33. So if p.s.g bid 20mil,cabaye is gone if not,they force him to stay against his wishes..who is the captain of the French team?

  34. I think Pardew is doing a comedy act now, he says:

    “Cabaye is a great player. In my opinion, he is one of the best in the world in that position and I have worked with Michael Carrick and (Javier) Mascherano, so I like to think I know.”

    I think he was sacked with Mascherano in his team and probably sacked when he managed Carrick.

    In my opinion, Cabaye is not in the top 50 players in the world. He certainly wouldn’t get into the Barcelona, Madrid or Bayern teams.

  35. I heard some daft rumour the other day that a double bid was coming from PSG for Cabs and Deuchy – that would be great imo.

    Admittedly we’d have to rush out and buy a new RB, but the funds would surely allow 3/4 new arrivals (in the current buy ’em low and sell high system).

    Cabaye is a luxury – not strong enough or big enough for Def Mid, technically brilliant on free kicks but dreadful on corners, and got something like 2 assists last season.

    debuchy has never impressed me, very slow and wreckless in challenges, he’ll defo give away a couple of pens this season, cost us at least a game, and get himself sent off.

    And the sooner we shed some Frenchies, and become at least multi-national, if not ‘a bit more english’ – the better.

  36. P.s. – neither player would make my ‘ideal’, current starting 11:





  37. Milner, did we sign Stephane Mbia when I was out?

    I notice you’ve switched Santon over to the right hand side, yet you’ve still left the wingers playing on their ‘wrong’ sides.

  38. Worky, I wish you hadn’t put that video up, This f**kin’ Ashley and his gang of d**kheads, Have got some brass neck.
    Mind you the fans are just as culpable, If they start buying that kit!
    There really should be full on boycott of the Stadium, As this is the only way to rid ourselves of the parasite, Ashley!

    I’ve never been as p***ed off, As i am now, And i’m seriously thinking of walking away, For good!
    Pardew was giving his usual propaganda again, Through The Chronicle!
    I’m so angry with this puppet Pardew, That if i seen him, I don’t think i could be held responsible!
    He is responsible for Ashley taking more liberties, IMO, With his constant rolling over, And his toadying.
    If he grew a pair, And stood up to him, We the fans, Might not be suffering as much!

  39. joe hawkins says:
    August 23, 2013 at 2:44 pm

    “Pardew was giving his usual propaganda again, Through The Chronicle!”

    Is Cabaye actually refusing to play for the team or is it Pardew who is refusing to play him?

    Some people are gannin’ on about a Pardew interview with Mick Lowes but I haven’t heard it yet.

  40. Nope. I still don’t understand if Pardew is saying that:

    Cabaye is on strike and refusing to play for Newcastle United,

    That he feels that Cabaye’s head has been turned and he won’t pick him for the team or:

    He is delibartely being vague and suggesting that the Cabaye imbroglio is the latest reason for Newcastle United being shit and not himself.


  41. worky

    i’m not sure if it’s the same interview regarding cabaye.

    but the one i heard – pardew just stopped himself from saying it was taking out of his hands.

    he half said it & changed his direction if you know what i mean.

    he has a spine of jelly.

  42. Cabaye created more chances than anyone in the squad last season (by 20 or so) despite missing time.

    He wouldn’t walk into Barca’s first XI but then again neither would Williamson now would he? I wouldn’t recklessly offload either. Sissoko is very talented but the truth is Cabaye has shown an ability to play at a consistently high level in English league football that Sissoko has not. He was practically invisible at the end of the season when Goufran was the only new signing who still played well.

    Selling anyone out of our first XI is in no way the solution to this club’s problems.

    I’ve heard PSG’s bid is 20M pounds but I’ve also heard 15M euros, so who knows (especially given the English media’s inability to properly translate French sources)? And if AshleyCo won’t put the new TV money into transfers, why would they necessarily do so with any fee received?

    But I do cede: Cabaye is gone.

  43. Lets be honest, The only reason Parnocchio is not playing Cabaye, Is because Ashley doesn’t want his stock damaged, When it’s about to be sold.
    Which is ironic, As he doesn’t give a f**k, Any other time!
    The stock is hanging up, On the floor, At “Crap Direct” Headquarters.

  44. They can sell the little tosser Cabaye, For me!
    He obviously doesn’t want to be here, And to use an illness like depression last year, Was an absolute disgrace!
    From day one, He has only showed what he can do in flashes.
    He takes a good free kick, And passes the ball well, But tends to go missing, And games pass him by.
    He was like this from when he first signed, He was getting to the hour mark, And looking like he might collapse, And had to be replaced.
    Even the “The Fenham Eusabio” is quicker than him, And we all know how slow Shola is, But Cabaye makes him look like “Usain Bolt”!

    I have not got a problem with him being sold, But we all know that fat piece of excrement, Will not replace him!

  45. There was just a report on 5 news about companies who advertise massive sales through the media, ie, SCS, For three piece suits etc, And other firms for carpets.
    These companies are being investigated by the Trades Descriptions act, For something tantamount to false advetising!

    If that is the case, Then i wonder if a certain fat gentleman, Has not been contacted, By said authorities?
    Surely anyone sticking 70% off labels upon goods, Before they leave the factory, Is also guilty of the same malpractice!

  46. *sigh*

    Well I can understand rationalizing losing him as it looks certain to happen.

    He was still one of our better players last term even though he was certainly off form. Don’t be surprised if he goes to Arsenal or PSG and has a brilliant season. He’s a very skilled player dragged down by a reactive manager and the current iteration of NUFC malaise/low morale.

  47. Luke Moore released by Swansea…maybe we can afford him…get on it, Joe…

    Which makes me think-you know, the line about undue criticism of Kinnear is pretty much stood on its head at this point. Isn’t his remit to work on transfers? Yet we rip AP for lack of activity while JK is hardly ever mentioned anymore at all.

    Food for thought.

  48. tunyc says:
    August 23, 2013 at 5:57 pm

    “Yet we rip AP for lack of activity while JK is hardly ever mentioned anymore at all.”

    Most people rip him for being a shit manager with shit tactics, tunyc.

  49. worky @ 60: and that’s completely reasonable. I’m certainly not defending him from those criticisms. But I’ve noticed a few pieces lately where the frustration over this window is being directed at AP and it seems to me that would be better directed upstairs…

  50. We have had a few decent performances under Pardew, just not recently. I don’t know if he has lost the players, is coaching negative tactics or the new additions haven’t settled yet. I cant get my head around how we can look good against Chelsea and then capitulate to a Liverpool side that are nowhere near as good as Chelsea.

    I do know that utter shite comes out of his mouth which is what is really driving a lot of us crazy. Joe Hawkins will have a heart attack if he doesn’t watch out.

  51. GS says:
    August 23, 2013 at 8:00 pm

    “We have had a few decent performances under Pardew”

    GS, lots of shit managers have managed teams who have produced good performances and even had good seasons, it isn’t that simple. You have to look at things over the term and look at whether the manager is doing the right things (if you know what the right things are).

  52. The only way to get these clowns out is by voting with ur feet. Boycott the home games resulting in ultimate embarrassment for the owner/manager. Thus would highlight that they have no support and don’t give me the shite about the team need the support. They don’t, they are all mercenaries and hypocrites and couldn’t give a monkies whether u turn up or not at as long as they get their vast pay packets at the end of the month. The whole club stinks at the minute from the clueless owner, to the halfwit manager and director of transfers or whatever he is, to the players who have very little heart and even less talent. It breaks my heart to say it bit reality check needed. Let’s starve these helmets out and get our club back to where it should be instead of just making up the numbers!

  53. Clint Magnum Joe Hawkins lads you both summed up this shambles of a club 38 years been watching this lot with all the highs and mostly lows the West Ham game will be my last one ever if we dont show some fight enough is enough pardew has lost it now the team seems to have no direction and feel sorry for the die-hards who were at man city putting up with that crap.Can say dont enjoy watching the team any more so reckon this game will be my last can only see a hammers win 2 or 3 nowt.Only highlight taking my son to the toon for new footy boots never know he might get a game.