Kinnear – Why is there still no official confirmation from Newcastle United?

Posted on June 17th, 2013 | 113 Comments |

Uncle Joe: Why no word from the club?
Uncle Joe: Why no word from the club?
Since yesterday evening, there has certainly been no shortage of statements from Joe Kinnear on being appointed as a new Director of Football at Newcastle.

Like his new colleague Alan Pardew, keeping his mouth buttoned has never been one of Kinnear’s stronger points, though even he has surpassed himself this time with a verbal Tsunami of what he is going to do at Newcastle United over the next few months.

However, at the time of writing, there hasn’t been one word of confirmation or denial from Newcastle United.

Bearing in mind Kinnear’s previous, the club could perhaps be forgiven for not arranging a full press jamboree with Simon Bird in attendance to unveil their new key member of staff. However, at the time of writing, there hasn’t even been a small announcement in the news page of Newcastle United’s official website. Is it just me or is this rather odd?

To borrow the words of Marvin Gaye “What’s going on?”

Is it just the usual “Mickey Mouse” style of administration we have come to expect from Derek Llambias, or has Kinnear managed to pull off one of the greatest April fool’s jokes ever, an April fool’s joke which is all the more unexpected because it’s happening in the middle of June?

Though Alan Pardew is now back at his desk after his annual holiday, he has been uncharacteristically quiet too. Kinnear said that though Pardew has been told of his appointment by Derek Llambias, they hadn’t actually met face to face, or even spoken on the telephone about it, which is perhaps another example of Ashley and Llambias’s Mickey Mouse style.

If indeed it is true (and I am still pinching myself), it is an absolute joke to leave Kinnear to announce it himself. After all the incidents in the past such as inviting Mackem hoaxers to make offers for the club via e.mail, it is now hard to see what Laurel and Hardy can do now to make Newcastle United look any more incompetent and amateurish. No doubt though, they will show me in the fullness of time!

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113 Responses

  1. Kinnear is dog shit,he will get on well with Pardew both a pair of fookin’ losers :lol:

  2. Once again the owners stupity knows no bound if you ganna get a director of football you at lest get some1 who knows more about football than what he can fit on the back of a postage stamp

  4. I remember that, Sunderland fans were e-mailing them with offers of a couple of quid and pop bottle tops etc…
    After all llambias’s guff about opening this hi-tech Data room, It was as about low-tech as you could get, With the ridiculous offers they received!
    It couldn’t have been very secure, The so called Data room.
    I think one kid offered his fortnightly Giro as payment.
    It just shows how much of a bunch of buffoons, They really are!

    As for Gentleman Joe, He is prone to flights of fancy, And did talk some utter bollox, During his ill fated “reign”.
    Surely though, This story must have some legs, Or the medication kinnear is on, He had too much, And he was higher than Uma Thurman’s dressing table!

    That coffin Steve Wraith and some of the fans were carrying around, With “We’re Doomed”, On it, They’ll put Kinnear in that, After this disaster.
    If this job offer is Fair dinkum , Then it may finish him off, This time around!

  5. sirjasontoon says:
    June 17, 2013 at 2:39 pm

    “Kinnear is dog shit,he will get on well with Pardew both a pair of fookin’ losers”

    Kinnear certainly wasn’t a “loser” when he was in his prime as a manager, SJT. Pardew defenders point to his manager of the year award, but as Kinnear rightly stated in one of his interviews yesterday, he won three. He did that with the smallest team that has ever been in the Premier League, and he did it playing nice football too.

  6. They are to busy celebrating their great coupe.Their only priority is cheapness Pardew Wonga Puma etc..
    While others are going for the very best football brains they can afford Chelsea Man City Man United Everton etc..
    We are grubbing around looking for any “old has been” or “never was” who is cheap enough and will say yes sir on a regular basis.Face it your not going to change these second rate market traders way of thinking.I gave up years ago they don’t get any of my hard earned cash.I know Ive heard it “back the club” and I’m sure they will be queuing up come the beginning of the season.Just don’t expect things to change.Second Rate is all it will ever be.Newcastle United died when this buffoon got his sausage fingers on it.

  7. Me and wor lass would like to thank Mike for what he has done as wé get two holidays this year with thé money i save on a season ticket plus two new shirts

  8. Nutmag says:
    June 17, 2013 at 2:59 pm

    “Newcastle United died when this buffoon got his sausage fingers on it.”

    Well, Nutmag, Newcastle United has been in several abusive relationships since I started supporting as a bairn in the seventies, but Ashley is the first one to make the club so awful that I hardly feel I can recognise it anymore. He has scarred it beyond recognition. That’s nothing to do with Kinnear, just a general observation. Even if we were doing well on the pitch, I would still feel the same as he has just ripped all of the soul out of the club and turned it into an adjunct of Sports Direct.

  9. @madmag – jeez thats a cheap holiday

    In other news Joke in ear says he’ll sign Ronaldo and Messi along with any other player we want

  10. Worky @8
    Started my support in the forties and agree with you completely.He has also managed to sully the names of Kevin Keegan and Alan Shearer and divide the fans on many occasions.I may be flattering him when I say second rate he can only aspire to be second rate.I only hope the fans in some way will show some backbone in letting him know how they feel.Can’t see it somehow.

  11. Not too thrilled on this, but JFK doing this means old owl head will be away from football decisions and only on finance. Thats a good thing surely??

  13. Well I watched Kinnear’s Wimbledon, SJT. They were a very good side and if Kinnear was ten years younger, I would have have him as a manager over Pardew any day.

  14. @ workytickey
    lmao a very good side they got lucky won the fa cup once end of story

  15. Worky I just checked and he isn’t ten years younger but he has applied to be on the forthcoming series.

  16. They’ve really amped it up this time, so that there’s something more ridiculous about the appointment of JFK as DOF in the year 2013 than that appointment itself.

    Worky @ #5: I’ve taken your protestations about Kinnear to heart and I know he’s not incompetent…still, this is way too big an appointment. You’ve been out of football for 3 years? You have a heart condition? But you had some success about 20 years ago as a manager? Well here you go, here are the keys to one of the top 20 clubs in the world.

  17. TOONARMYELITE says:
    June 17, 2013 at 4:48 pm

    “@ workytickey
    lmao a very good side they got lucky won the fa cup once end of story”

    Toon, that was Bobby Gould. Kinnear kept them in the top half of the Premiership for 6 or 7 years with a tiny budget and gates of under 5,000. He also transforming their style of play from the “route one” tactics of Gould and Dave Bassett into something far more entertaining. After he had his first heart attack and retired as Wimbledon manager, they sunk like a stone and were relegated. That’s why he was awarded three manager of the year awards during his time there.

  18. Kinnear is no mug, And make no mistake about that!
    It’s just he’s at a time in his life, Where he has had health problems, And he’s not the force he once was?
    The only trouble with him the last time around, Was his talking bull for Ashley.

    The biggest indictment against Ashley, As opposed to some of the other crooks we’ve had here, Is he does have the money.
    The likes of your Mckeag’s, Westwood’s, And seymour’s etc, Although they were robbing b*****ds, They never had the riches of that fat parasite, Ashley, So that makes him head and shoulders above the rest imo.

    When ever we have had dodgy boards in the past, At least the fans were united in their hatred of them, And at least they didn’t mess with the clubs traditions.
    In Ashley, I’ve never seen a more divisive, Sly and underhand character, As he is.
    The way he has had the fans at each other’s throats, And the way he has picked away at every fibre of being, This club was, Is an absolute disgrace!

  19. <<<<<<<<<<< this dude here thinks its time for a vote see how many really want this loser as director of football here

  20. No official announcement because Pardew is still unable to think of anything printable about the situation. JFK has few redeemable qualities but worst of all perhaps is the Walter Mitty-style witless lying. (eg “3 Manager of the Year Awards” should read 3 Manager of The Month Awards” – not really the same thing at all.) The idiotic drivel that comes out of his potty mouth is hardly going to raise Newcastle’s profile and encourage players to come here. He’s both a clown and a dinosaur (more a tramp’s Thunderbird-inspired hallucination than a director of football); more importantly he’s a waste of money and a laughing stock before he’s even been officially given the job. What a c***t, to misquote appropriately.

  21. SideshowBen says:
    June 17, 2013 at 5:51 pm

    “JFK has few redeemable qualities but worst of all perhaps is the Walter Mitty-style witless lying. (eg “3 Manager of the Year Awards” should read 3 Manager of The Month Awards” – not really the same thing at all.)”

    No, he really did win three manager of the year awards with Wimbledon, SideshowBen. He was telling the truth.

  22. stop ducking the issue over there workey and stop trying to paper over the cracks and weres the democracy in progress in other words were is the vote

  23. Worky: I just read “The Mag” saying he only won one manager of the year (that’s where sideshowben might have got it from). Aren’t there two awards though, one from their peers and maybe the League? The Mag are usually good with facts, but you are very rarely wrong on things like that so I tend to believe you.

  24. In amongst Kinnear’s comments he did say he would be having a look at the “style of play”. That has to mean that Ashley recognises the route one game we play is not suited to our talent.

    I know very little about Wimbledon, but Worky says Kinnear changed them from route one. Tactics and style of play are 2 sides of the same coin so I think there may be a bit of conflict with Alan here.

  26. GS says:
    June 17, 2013 at 6:11 pm

    “Worky: I just read “The Mag” saying he only won one manager of the year”

    They’re wrong then, GS, he won three.

  28. dont matter how many manager of the season he won it dont matter how many manager of the month awards he won what matters here is do the toon army want him yes or no

  30. GS says:
    June 17, 2013 at 6:35 pm

    ‘Does that stand for “Joe F*ckin’ Kinnear”? An in joke?’

    Same as Kenny Dalglish should have been known as King Kenny as in “That ‘King Kenny should have been ‘King shot”.

  31. More from Kinnear’s Wikipedia: he won the Oxford Dictionary “Good English” award for public speaking. I wonder if Simon Bird agrees.

  32. Yeah, he only looks to have the one LMA manager of the year award (1994). He never won the PL version and the LMA winners in ’95 and ’97 were Frank Clark and Danny Wilson. Bit of confusion here but then to paraphrase Sick Boy, the award means FA anyway so…

  34. I might have said this already, but this has to be good news because the owner has realised that Pardew is not up to the job and Llambias doesn’t know football.

    Maybe Kinnear isn’t the right man for the job, I don’t know, but it is probably a step in the right direction.

  35. GS says:
    June 17, 2013 at 8:21 pm

    “I might have said this already, but this has to be good news because the owner has realised that Pardew is not up to the job and Llambias doesn’t know football.

    Maybe Kinnear isn’t the right man for the job, I don’t know, but it is probably a step in the right direction.”

    And then Pards walks away and takes Ashley to the cleaners over constructive dismissal.

  36. Pete_toon: how is it constructive dismissal? Companies change their management structure all of the time (mainly to give the CEO an additional title (Chairman) and more money, or give a relative a job (Murdochs) but they do it)

  37. GS: If it becomes apparent that they have made his position untenable, then he can suggest constructive dismissal.

  38. @37: is that what happened with Keegan? I didn’t follow it closely but know he got a decent pay-out.

  39. I am not too troubled by this appointment. It may be a very canny move. It certainly puts more pressure on Pardew to produce results and that can be no bad thing. If things go wrong, it may force Pardew out and Joe in as a temporary manager. Mike Ashley knows the cost of relegation and he will do whatever it takes to avoid that, even if it means forking out more than he would wish on a capable manager. At that point, Joe needs to be told to sit down, shut up and stay out of the way.

  40. GS-I think you’re grasping at straws. It really matters not if MA has realized that AP isn’t up to the task if he thinks hiring Kinnear is going to address that. I’m not knocking Kinnear, BUT: this is his first time in a job like this; listening to him, it sounds like he thinks he has either Pardew’s job or Carr’s; putting aside his short stint with NUFC, this is his first football job in 9 years. It’s madness. I don’t think this will help. At best it makes no difference. I doubt that, though, not least because of Kinnear’s volatile personality.

  43. tunyc: I probably am grasping at straws. When Kinnear was NUFC manager it was month to month. He never really had any clear mandate – just like now?

    What the hell, it can’t be worse than the shite we watched last season.

    We should complete the circle of gobshites and hire Harry Redknapp.

  45. I just listened to it Worky.

    Derek resigned!!!

    Kinnear says he has more intelligence than any of the fans – that’ll get us on his side :)

    Lambasee resigned as well.

  46. So the interview was tonight, and he did say Llambias had resigned (at least from the football side). That is big news that I hadn’t seen before – he had just said that Pardew was glad to have a football man (Kinnear) at the club now.

  47. Reading between the lines it looks like Derek jumped before he was pushed. The Wonga and Puma deals are set up and it seems Charnley does the player contracts. What is there left for Dekka now except to run around St. James’ naked and wait for a payoff?

  50. Worky, I listened and my jaw didn’t drop. OK, so the guy isn’t the world’s best linguist but he sounded a lot more reasonable and rational than I expected.

  52. I’m starting to wonder if Kinnear is going all David Icke on the world. Then again, with his towering intellect and hotline to all the worlds managers, he’s obviously on a higher plane than I am.

  53. The subject of this blog, ie still no JFK announcement from the club is now being mentioned on the news programme of record, Radio 4’s “Today” show alongside Afghanistan, Somali pirates, George Osbourne etc…

  54. worky, it’s obvious why there’s been no announcement. Derek Llambias is trying to track down who this Lambeezi character is, and why they were director of football at Newcastle.

  55. Pete, to be fair, bad as he is, Kinnear’s no worse than Robson used to be with player’s names. Even Bobby couldn’t go wrong with “Shepherd” and “Hall” though.

  56. I am having a Yohan tonight-plenty salad Naan Bread and Chilli Sauce :lol:

    Deluded Dinosaur.

  57. Worky, even Sir Bobby at his most forgetful would never have called N’Zogbia, Insomnia.

  58. Bobby Robson to Bryan Robson: “Morning Bobby”

    Bryan Robson: “No boss, you’re Bobby”

    Bobby Robson: “Don’t bullshit me, I never forget a name, Steve.” :lol:

  60. Wish we had got Roy Kinnear in and he has been dead a while now.Still more funnnier than this idiot.

  62. sandybaz says:
    June 18, 2013 at 9:59 am

    “Wish we had got Roy Kinnear in and he has been dead a while now.”

    Graham Carr reminds me a bit of Roy Kinnear.

  63. Hang on a minute!, Has Joe not worked as a scout before?, I’m sure he has!
    Why is everyone having a go at Kinnear?, At the end of the day, It’s not his fault, Ashley has appointed him.
    Give him a chance, After all he was the one who brought Kevin Nolan to the club, And Raylor.
    Last season everyone was saying how much we missed Nolan, At the club.
    Raylor has scored some important goals for this club, ie, Sunderland, So howay!, Everyone needs to take a broader view.

    Was Joe that much of a disaster when he was here?, We got up to around 12th or 13th, And who knows, We may have avoided the drop.
    Our defence looked like it tightened up a bit, And we looked more organized.
    It went t*ts up when he had a heart attack, And hughton stepped in, But was only a stop gap, Then Shearer took them down.
    Taylor and Lovenkrands have been singing his praises, And he supposed to be a good bloke to have around the place, And is a good motivator, Which has been sadly lacking.
    I think that divvy Pardew needs someone to have a word with him.
    Okay it’s not ideal, But they are the cards we’ve been dealt, So we have to get on with it!

    Anyone wishing Joe Kinnear to have another heart attack, Are a bunch of sick degenerate b*****ds!

  64. joe hawkins says:
    June 18, 2013 at 10:34 am

    “Hang on a minute!, Has Joe not worked as a scout before?, I’m sure he has!”

    Joe, The last time he was a director of football (at Luton), he ended up sacking the manager and and taking over himself. :-)

    The manager he sacked was Lil Fuccillo who went on to be Dennis Wise’s Chief Scout at Newcastle United.

    “Anyone wishing Joe Kinnear to have another heart attack, Are a bunch of sick degenerate b*****ds!”

    That was Newcastle United Mad!!!!!! It’s usually them when it comes to the sick, nasty stuff that goes too far.

  65. What a surprise chief arse kisser Taylor has praised his appointment. Just like he has every decision for the last five years and every manager he’s worked under.

  66. Worky, Apparently he had the D.O.F role at Oxford United, But left through ill health, But the real reason was he didn’t have enough say, As he would have liked.
    Well he has done this role before, Without much success, But how much can you do at places like Luton Town and Oxford United, With the greatest respect.

  70. After a season of Pardew’s pompous patter, the return of the Joe Kinnear show is like a breath of fresh air. All we need now is the return of the Joey Barton show too.

  72. Is Kebab off to Monaco?
    Need to Get the lowdown ofF JK on this,should be an update soon once he sits down with Lambeezee later today.

  73. we’re going to hell in a handcart – but i’ll be laughing all the way there.

  74. Steven Taylor seems happy :lol:

    He told Sky Sports: “I am really happy to see Joe back at the club, and I think his return can only be positive for everyone connected to the club.

    “Joe was great for me when he was manager, and I really enjoyed playing for him.

  75. George Bush appointed Dick Cheney to look for a vice President and he ended up with Dick Cheney. Fatty has shown the same sort of competence as “W” so we will probably end up with Kinnear as manager.

  78. This is going to be one bizzare ride, That’s for sure!
    I’m not going to have a go at Joe, But the whole thing is doomed to failure!
    The good thing that might come out of this, Is at the end of it, We might see the back of Mike Ashley.
    Surely this disaster will leave him nowhere else to go, So they might be light at the end of the tunnel, Here’s hoping anyway!

  81. Joe Kinnear can come in and do the job well, And we could unearth some good players, But the problem of Pardew being s**t, Still remains.
    If he in charge of the team on match days, He’s still going to play people out of position, And make terrible substitutions, And lack any kind of plan B.
    He’s just going to be under more pressure, And even more scrutiny, He’s destined to completely f**k it up!
    It will be amusing to see who the next sap will be, Surely they wouldn’t put Joe back on the touchline.
    Billy Davies or Ian Holloway, Or Ian Dowie?, Then hopefully the penny will drop, And he’ll sell up!

  82. From the sublime to the ridicules continuing to the bizarre, never a moment that is not either controversial or crazy.
    That I’m afraid has been the lot of Newcastle fans, since the arrival of Ashley.
    His appointments have shown, that KK was right, the man knows nothing about football and surprisingly for a businessman, has never had the understanding that what he needed most of all was someone who understood both the financial side and also understood what constituted fiscal responsibility in regard to the buying and selling of players.
    Not the selection of players which should be the responsibility of both the manager and scouting, only the final decision on whats affordable.
    The other responsibility would of course be the expansion of the brand name.
    So far his attempts have lacked results, using St. James’ Park as an advertising board, met both with fan resistance and for someone who is in the sports related rag trade, little success.
    The current WONGA deal could turn into another controversy, which is not what he needs at this stage, having for the most part completely alienated the majority of fans, who may in fact boycott the WONGA logo shirt.
    The appointment of Joe Kinnear is both controversial and somewhat bizarre, though for me, it’s a matter of anyone but Pardew
    Probably a case of having someone in place to take over from Pardew when he either resigns or get’s the push, which will I hope will come soon.
    Now there’s the hope that Ashley may realise this can only be a stop gap until a decent young manager, who understands the modern game can be found, as rebuilding a side is no job for someone who has been out of the game for the most pard for over a decade and is pushing seventy.
    Plus the job of director of football is not for an ex football manager/player, it’s a position for someone with financial expertese who also has an understanding of the ins and outs of the playing side, and his job should be primarily to promote the financial side of the club, to grow the brand name and ensure fiscal responsibility.
    The resignation of Llambias is a step in the right direction, which should be followed by Pardews departure, the appointment of a real director of football and eventually the appointment of a young manager who has a knowledge of the modern game ,who can effectively use the talent we have accumulated and hopefully win something for the fans who have been starved of any success in the recent past,through miss management.

  83. Has Lambezee left the club? He f@cking well should. St. Mirren, Motherwell, Braga and 2 Portuguese second division teams? That’s a preseason?

  84. May as well be playing Helen Mirren as St. Mirren. At least she got her t*ts out when she was younger.

  87. yohan cabaye is reportedly very upset at being branded – yohan kebab – by jfk.

    his wife donna is also said to be furious!

  91. Worky: I will always read your blog even if Chuckadoodledoo is on here.

    Ed’s has a bunch of kids and Toonsy’s has Troy and Rodzillacock.

  93. Worky, Interesting article, I wonder what the conspiracy could be?
    Could Mike Ashley actually own the pay day lender himself?

  95. Worky, Going into the realms of conspiracy, What if Kinnear’s appointment is meant to have that effect?
    I remember a bloke that went under the moniker “Hit man”,From Ed’s blog, And he used to say Ashley was a psy-ops merchant.
    What if this move is designed to garner support for Pardew, After the criticism he has had.
    Just imagine first home game of the season, Pardew steps from his dug out to a standing ovation, Then it’s job done.
    Kinnear will not mind being the Pantomime baddie, And is his role isn’t going to make that much of a difference to proceedings, Anyway!
    It’s basically just an exercise in “Jobs For The Boys”, And Llambias gets back to the business side.

  98. When you look at the deal it doesn’t really do a great deal for W****A.COM, So there’s something funny about the whole thing.

  99. Yeah Joe: Pardew still might want to pick 5 defensive midfielders in the same side and Roy Kinnear might save him from that.

    The England cricket selectors picked fat boy Eddie Hemmings for a few tests and they were supposed to know what they were doing as well.

    If Joe Kinnear was there they wouldn’t have done that.

  101. Just think Ashley could be hooking up the most vulnerable members of society, With high interest rates.
    The first port of call to spend their loan, Sports Direct, When these poor unfortunates walk away with their skip full of swag, Thinking they have a bargain.
    When it’s time to pack back that said loan, The bargain they thought they were getting, Is costing them 3 times as much.
    It would be one hell of a scam, If Ashley was running the show.

    I’m just waiting for W****A.COM to start lending people money for their season ticket, At St James’ Park, And pay for it 3 times over lol.

  103. It get’s worse. Taken directly from NUFC’s website “Joe will report directly to the club’s board as the senior executive in charge of all football related matters. Chief scout Graham Carr and manager Alan Pardew will report to Joe.”
    Odds on AP being the first premiership managerial casualty of the new season must be 1-1000 now. And that’s if he even gets as far as the opening day.

  104. Danny b, He’s been a willing dupe so far, So unless something happens in same mode of “KEEGANGATE”, Then i think he’ll toe the line.
    He wasn’t really in the loop where transfers were concerned anyway.
    Does Pardew not know Joe from back in the day?, If he does, It might make it a bit easier.
    I just think Pardew will never have a gig as big as this one, And maybe an elephant gun, Might not shift him.
    The only way i can see him walking, Is if Joe starts trying to interfere with the first team matters.

  105. Will there be a Cockney showdown then? Will Alan and Joe’s heeds be doing that Cockney chicken thing where their heeds keep bobbing backwards and forwards as they stare each other out? Will they be surrounded by lasses trying to hold them back saying “leave it Alan / leave it Joe, he ain’t wurf it! He ain’t wurf it?”

  106. Oh F@ck. I just listened to “Muse” for the first time. Does the lead singer have a lazy eye as well?

  108. GS says:
    June 18, 2013 at 9:22 pm

    “Oh F@ck. I just listened to “Muse” for the first time. Does the lead singer have a lazy eye as well?”

    Do you mean Thom Yorke from Radiohead, GS?

  111. Joe Hawkins: I looked up Rolling Stones best albums ever. It is all Beatles, Stones and Dylan.

    I don’t have any of their music because it is played on the radio all of the time and I cant take it any more.

    The only ones I can listen to is “London Calling”, Or “OK Computer” or Black Sabbath and Lynyrd Skynryd Greatest Hits.

  112. Worky @108: I heard Muse’s Absolution and just played Radiohead to take the bad taste out of my mouth.

  113. Hmmmmmm? You know we were all sick of past-due’s spouting off drivel at any given opportunity, well, I think he’s now going to look quite eloquent in comparison. On the other hand they could cancel each other out, you know, like a double negative, or, like its not possible for 2 such deluded w@nkers to occupy the same spacetime? Anywhoo, bring forth the clowns.