Newcastle United vs West Brom match banter!

Posted on October 28th, 2012 | 147 Comments |

Newcaastle United v West Bromwich Albion.
Magpies v Throstles - Who will get the juicy 3 point worm?
Venue: St James’ Park, Newcastle.
Date: Sunday, 28th Oct.
Kick off: 3:00pm
Referee: Chris Foy.
UK TV: None.

Hello, good afternoon and welcome to our “match banter” feature for this afternoon’s Magpies game against West Bromwich Albion at St James’ Park.

In the Premier League betting stakes, Newcastle United are the favourites this afternoon, with home advantage and Newcastle’s fifth place finish last season seemingly trumping the fact that West Brom are three places higher in the current Premiership table as we go onto this game. However it should be a very tough match between the Magpies and the Throstles, a match which could go either way.

For all the information you’ll ever need in the run up to this game however, please check out my collegue Andy’s excellent match preview, with all the team news, form guides, opinion and such. To that, I will add what Alan Pardew and West Brom manager Steve Clarke, who as you may know was a former Newcastle United assistant, as well as a caretaker very briefly (for one game) after the departure of Ruud Gullit in 1999, holding the fort until Bobby Robson took over for his five year stint as manager.

Firstly, our current Silver Supremo, Alan Pardew, was fulsome in his praise (as managers usually are in these pre match interviews). Speaking of Clarke’s transition from highly sought after assistant to manager at West Bromwich, Pardew gushed:

“It’s like anything. You don’t get the starring role in a production unless you’ve been in the back for a little while, be it the chorus line or whatever. That’s how I got into the game. I was reserve-team manager at Reading for two or three years. Steve had a longer period when he was first-team assistant. He’s just done a cracking job at all the places he was at. So when the time came and there was an opportunity to become a manager, he had all the experience. That Steve was going to be a success was no mystery to anyone in the management trade. It did not surprise anyone.”

Meanwhile, Steve Clarke himself had another Newcastle United Silver Supremo in his thoughts, Bobby Robson. Speaking of the now sadly departed ex-manager, Clarke had this to say:

“I was lucky to work with Bobby for a year and I took a lot from the way he dealt with and managed the players. He was great to me because he knew I was a young coach who wanted to learn and he sat me in on some of the meetings when he was one-to-one with a player. He would have me there to watch and observe and see how he spoke to and dealt with players and that was absolutely invaluable for me. It was just his manner and his way of getting the best out of players. As a manager there is not one way to get the best out of a number of different people. There are a number of different ways to get the best and Bobby seemed to have the gift of being able to recognise and understand what sort of motivational tool he had to use at that time.”

However, he also didn’t forget about out current silver haired supremo either, Speaking on Pardew’s current Newcastle United team he remarked:

“I thought they were fantastic last season. I would say it is the best team since that Sir Bobby team that did really well. They came out of that into a period that was a little more rocky and now they’re trying to get that stability back. If you can get stability at any club then it makes it easier for the people who are trying to make it successful.”

Gushing further about Newcastle, he also said:

“I think Newcastle is a blueprint for any club with ambition. Every club wants to be successful and, if you are, is it the right thing to go out and sign 20 players and double the size of your squad, or do you try to nurture what you’ve got and bring through some young ones? That’s what Newcastle have done and they’ve done it with a good balanced squad and without being crazy in the transfer market. That’s a good blueprint for a number of clubs who might be in that position in the future. I’m sure they can challenge towards the top half of the league. The fact that they have the Europa League to contend with as well is an issue. They have done a great job to get in the position they’re at in the Europa League, where they’ve managed to almost qualify from the group. If they could win their next game they would be comfortable. To balance the two competitions (Premier League and Europa League) must have been a bit of a challenge for Alan Pardew and his staff and I think they have done it well.”

And finally, of his time in Newcastle he reminisced:

“I had a great time at Newcastle. It was very early in the career of my development as a coach. It was the first two years out of playing. I got some wonderful friends from my time up there. I still keep in touch with them. The supporters are fantastic, it is a great football city and I look forward to taking my team up there and giving them a game. It’s a place where everyone lives for their football. The first thing you see when you come into Newcastle is the stadium, it’s right on the top of a hill.

“They are trying to build a bit of stability into a club that maybe has not been known for its stability over the years.”

Well that’s more than enough mutual flattery from those two, so I will wrap things up with the usual reminders that I will be posting the teamsheets for this afternoon’s game when thay become available, as well as posting highlights, and probably a video of the whole match once it’s all over.

This game will not be broadcast on UK TV, however fear not! I will also be posting some lists of links to the game when they become available too. I would recommend using the “Spocast” player though rather than the Flash links. If you don’t have the Sopcast player, you can download it from here. The best Sopcast links are usually those from “Bloodzeed” BTW, which are always of excellent quality when available for Newcastle United games. Which only leaves it for me to say:

Howay the Lads!

Team sheets

Newcastle United (4-4-2): Tim Krul (G), Danny Simpson, Mike Williamson, Fabricio Coloccini (C), Davide Santon, Hatem Ben Arfa, James Perch, Yohan Cabaye, Jonas Gutierrez, Shola Ameobi, Demba Ba.

Subs: Steve Harper (G), Shane Ferguson, Steven Taylor, Vurnon Anita, Gabriel Obertan, Sammy Ameobi, Papiss Cisse

West Bromwich Albion (4-2-3-1): Ben Foster (G), Gabriel Tamas, Gareth McAuley, Jonas Olsson, Liam Ridgewell; Youssouf Mulumbu, James Morrison; Peter Odemwingie, Zoltan Gera, Graham Dorrans; Romelu Lukaku.

Subs: Luke Daniels (G), Gonzalo Jara Reyes, Goran Popov, Yassine El Ghanassy, Markus Rosenberg, Shane Long, Marc-Antoine Fortune.

Poll

NUFCBlog Author: workyticket workyticket has written 1095 articles on this blog.

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147 Responses

  1. James Perch has been handed a starting spot for Newcastle United as they entertain West Bromwich Albion on Sunday afternoon (3pm kick-off).

    The inclusion of the versatile former Nottingham Forest is an enforced swap, replacing the suspended Cheick Tiote, who was sent off against Sunderland last weekend.

    And that is the Magpies’ only change to their starting line-up from the one which took to the Stadium of Light pitch seven days ago.

    It means manager Alan Pardew has kept faith with centre-back Mike Williamson and striker Shola Ameobi, so Steven Taylor and Papiss Cisse have to be content with a seat on the substitutes’ bench.

    There are nine alterations from Thursday night’s Europa League victory over Club Brugge, but in terms of United’s Premier League team it is very familiar.

    A 4-4-2 formation is expected, with goalkeeper Tim Krul protecting a back four of Danny Simpson, Williamson, captain Fabricio Coloccini and Davide Santon.

    Yohan Cabaye and Perch will make up the hosts’ central midfield partnership, with Hatem Ben Arfa and Jonas Gutierrez providing creativity from either flank.

    And Ameobi partners six-goal leading scorer Demba Ba, who bagged a double when the Baggies came to Tyneside last season.

    On the bench there are places for Shane Ferguson, Sammy Ameobi and Gabriel Obertan following impressive midweek performances against Brugge.

    West Brom name on-loan Chelsea forward Romelu Lukaku up front on his own, while ex-Middlesbrough midfielder James Morrison is also in the starting line-up.

    Newcastle United (4-4-2): Tim Krul; Danny Simpson, Mike Williamson, Fabricio Coloccini (c), Davide Santon; Hatem Ben Arfa, James Perch, Yohan Cabaye, Jonas Gutierrez; Shola Ameobi, Demba Ba

    Substitutes: Steve Harper, Shane Ferguson, Steven Taylor, Vurnon Anita, Gabriel Obertan, Sammy Ameobi, Papiss Cisse

    West Bromwich Albion (4-2-3-1): Ben Foster; Gabriel Tamas, Gareth McAuley, Jonas Olsson, Liam Ridgewell; Youssouf Mulumbu, James Morrison; Peter Odemwingie, Zoltan Gera, Graham Dorrans; Romelu Lukaku

    Substitutes: Luke Daniels, Gonzalo Jara Reyes, Goran Popov, Yassine El Ghanassy, Markus Rosenberg, Shane Long, Marc-Antoine Fortune

  2. Interesting Clarke has preferred Lukaku to Long upfront. Maybe he sees Willo getting bullied by the big man ?

  3. GingerMag says:
    October 28, 2012 at 3:02 pm

    “Thought Shane had done enough against Brugge to earn himself a start”

    Sammy Ameobi was about the best player in that one Gingermag, and he’s on the bench too.

  4. GingerMag says:

    “Thought Shane had done enough against Brugge to earn himself a start”

    You’re aware the manager is a halfwit GM ?

  5. goodoldjimgold says:
    October 28, 2012 at 3:14 pm (Edit)

    “What’s the best link to use? Mine is in spanish!”

    I’m watching the first one on the wiziwig list Jim, but that one’s in Russian. It doesn;t bother me as the English commentator are so full of guff anyway.

  6. GingerMag says:

    “Thought Shane had done enough against Brugge to earn himself a start”

    In addition to which Tamas is allegedly the weak link in the back four. Jones is obviously not fully recovered and Reid (first choice) is still easing his way back !

  7. That said, it was from a long kick and a knock down again. We need goals from other ways and means.

  8. workyticket says:

    “Happy now Andy?”

    Yeah why bother with HBA and Cabaye when we can just hoof balls up the middle and get the big bloke to knock it on to the other big bloke :(

    I’m sorry but we have players who are better than this !

  9. “Yeah why bother with HBA and Cabaye when we can just hoof balls up the middle and get the big bloke to knock it on to the other big bloke :(

    I’m sorry but we have players who are better than this !”

    You dont have to keep schtum if you disagree this blog is all about opinions :}

    I want the points but I’d like to win creatively as we did against the Baggies last season at the Hawthorns.

    I think Pardwho has a real concern about 4-3-3 cos he got “raped” by Martinez’s 3-4-3 at Wigan and couldnt do anything to prevent it !

  10. I’m a big fan of the 4-3-3, personally thinks it better suits our players. Perhaps the transfer of Ba to liverpool thats being mooted about would enforce that change?…all be it 2 months too late

  11. Can’t even finish them off. Go one up and shut up shop every week. Wasn’t Lukaku’s two chances enough warning.

  12. Listen to that crowd ! This turgid unimaginative football does not lend itself to motivating the crowd !

    I was at Kingston park on Friday and even though there was only 4k there it had more atmosphere.

  13. Zzzzz we need the points today because we will lose to Liverpool. Probably by three goals as usual.

  14. maze202 says:

    “Toontony we can’t hear you!Probably because he’s too busy biting his nails :)”

    “There’s only one team gonna win this” said the commentator and we know who that is !!!

  15. Whatever happens. Yet again we’ve been second best against a team we should beat comfortably at home. Very poor.

  16. Typical Pardew second full season. We look like a bunch of strangers. Wonder who’s missus he’s been banging?

  17. Wooo we don’t deserve fck all. This doesn’t paper over anything. Not me anyway. I’m sure some will now forget how dross this has been.

  18. Absolutely lacklustre display, if it wasnt for some fine saves/woeful finishing from Krul/Lukaku we would have been on the end of a drubbing here.

  19. There’ll be 50K Geordies who’ll believe Pardwho’s after match claptrap when he says “Cisse just needed that to kick start his season!!”

  20. tunyc says:

    “Wow. Home in time to watch last 20 minutes. Apparently that’s all I needed to see!”

    You lucky bastad :)

  21. AndyMac says:
    October 28, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    “There’ll be 50K Geordies who’ll believe Pardwho’s after match claptrap”

    Will you ever, ever stop calling him “Pardwho” Andy?

  22. WT says :

    “Will you ever, ever stop calling him “Pardwho” Andy?”

    Might help if you read your own blog now and again !

    ““Andy, Our Silver Supremo’s name is NOT spelt P-A-R-D-W-H-O!”

    Soz WT but he’ll always be Pardwho to me cos he’s here not for his ability as a manager but because he’s a brown nose !

    We all know he’s had very little “winning” on his CV and this stat about not winning games after going behind just typifies the bloke as far as I’m concerned.

    If you cant see what’s needed to change a game around you might as well be the kitman or the physio for all the good you’re doing in the dug out !”

  23. Well I do think this can be an important win for the club and it is certainly true that 3 points makes it easier to overlook the flaws in our game.

    That said…

    It’s very disappointing to see us in 4-4-2 at home v WBA with this squad. It’s timid. It’s easy enough to forget how we never, ever win by more than a couple and score more than 3 very seldom but the inability to kill off games is the same problem that sees us locked into draws with pedestrian sides. It reminds me of Benitez at LFC at his worst when he still had a good squad but screwed himself with unadventurous tactics, too much rotation, zonal marking and an inability/unwillingness to see the problems these brought. Things have gone this way in the past for AP in his managerial career. This way of managing will can also alienate talented players. Think that happened with Alonso and I think that could well happen to HBA here. Latest rumor has Arsenal wanting him. I know it’s paper crap but I can certainly understand why he might be interested in such a switch. At least he won’t be shackled to a fullback he has to cover there…

  24. AndyMac says:
    October 28, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    “A big up to Sammy for keeping going right to the end !”

    He was only on about 15 minutes Andy, he would hardly have been fatigued.

  25. Had about 15 mins to reflect.

    It was a fantastic performance and well deserved three points. Bring on Liverpool at Anfield. We can beat them with these types of performances…

  26. workyticket says:

    “A big up to Sammy for keeping going right to the end !”

    He was only on about 15 minutes Andy, he would hardly have been fatigued.

    I meant for keeping going when all around him were showing no inclination to do so apart from maybe HBA ?

  27. Poor old Chuck couldnt contribute to the banter cos he’s watching the Mancs and Toon are on stream for 50 minutes time.

    Anyone feel like telling him not to bother ? :)

  28. So, JimBob: if it is so f@cking bad then why don’t you just support somebody else – Mackems????????????

  29. GS says:

    “So, JimBob: if it is so f@cking bad then why don’t you just support somebody else – Mackems????????????”

    Now now GS dont start :roll:

  30. AndyMac says:
    October 28, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    “I meant for keeping going when all around him were showing no inclination to do so apart from maybe HBA ?”

    Aye Andy, but they must be knacked chasing a ball around for 90 odd minutes Pardew style. That’s what I meant about Sameobi only being on for a few minutes.

  31. There is just too much moaning on here. We will tw@t the red scouse and win the next 2 after that.

  32. JimBob: I fart around when it gets boring on here, but you would know that already because you are the one that bores me.

  33. tunyc says:

    “I know it’s paper crap but I can certainly understand why he might be interested in such a switch. At least he won’t be shackled to a fullback he has to cover there…”

    Agreed I can see Cabaye and HNA wanting out by the end of this seaon if they have to repress their abilities for the sake of Pardwho’s vision of football.

  34. GS says:

    “TWe will tw@t the red scouse and win the next 2 after that”

    So tell us how exactly that will pan out GS ?

  35. Also, JB I have been stuck in the middle of nowhere for a week looking after a dead friend’s dog for a week. I either come on here and write tripe or watch Obama/Romney ads 24 hours a day.

  36. AndyMac: I am just a total optimist when it comes to NUFC. I can’t help it. When we are 2 down, I still think we will win.

    I can’t explain it, but that is the way I am.

  37. Jimbob says:

    “Gotta be a close call between watching that or our performance today surely?”

    Nah give me a dead dog any day especially over Obama and Romney !

  38. JB: even the internet died on me, after 70 minutes! So I followed it on texts.

    As I said almost before, what do you want? Write something now and again if you don’t want me to write!

  39. GS, write whatever you want. Just don’t say “support the mackems” if you disagree with something I say. I fckin hate it when people say that it’s totally mental. If you don’t like what I’ve said then call me on it, disagree or whatever as long as we can be constructive.

  40. I dont moan GS, I’m trying to educate 50K fans into seeing that the Emperor has no clothes :)

  41. Jim Bob: don’t worry. We just have to press the red bindippers and have Hatem play a better game. Ba will score when given half a chance and so will Cisse. Shola won’t though.

  42. AndyMac: I read your match previews so I know what you think. Sort of like me, just waiting for the time when it will just all click into place?

    In our lifetime?

  43. AndyMac says:
    October 28, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    “I dont moan GS, I’m trying to educate 50K fans into seeing that the Emperor has no clothes”

    Perhaps Pardew is a genius and we are the ones who are naked Andy?

  44. And JimBob: I was so upset about my dog, it helped to say something on here. Sorry, I impacted your life about it.

  45. we’ll take the three points, but ffs we were lucky to win that game.
    to not turn up in the second half, until the last 10 minutes, is just not good enough.
    what the hell is pardew telling them, in the dressing room?
    his team talks must be s**t, for them to be worse in the second half, that’s all i can say!

    we cannot continue with pardew’s, “excalibur” brand of football, because it is medieval, at best.
    wouldn’t suprise me if the name pardew, was in the doomsday book.

    utter folly, to give this cupcake an 8 year contract, this squad are too good for him, and he doesn’t deserve them.
    the ironic thing is, old kevin keegan, would have had these playing good football.
    he would have loved to work with ben arfa, cabaye, tiote, cisse, ba etc.

  46. WT says:

    “Perhaps Pardew is a genius and we are the ones who are naked Andy?”

    Did I not say Pardwho would come out with some claptrap ?

    So guess what ?

    ” These Thursday/Sunday games are killing us “

  47. So, Jimbob: Now I have to drive 100 miles to look after my dead friend’s dog for a week before someone flies in to look after him. Does that make any sense why it is on my mind??????? And my dog dropped dead last week….

    Just saying.

  48. You know what I could do now – bore myself to death. There is American “football” and baseball on. Each are 3 hours long with about 20 minutes of actual “action”. They are only good for drinking to because the games themselves are incredibly boring.

    So even the worst NUFC game, fan’s quiet game, could not possibly be as boring.

  49. Sorry to hear about your Dog GS. I lost mine a few years back and it was horrible.

    Sorry it was my comments that raged you enough to feel the need to suggest I should support Sunderland.

  50. TROJAN RECORDS 73 says:
    October 28, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    “utter folly, to give this cupcake an 8 year contract,”

    Trojan, don’t worry your pretty little head about that, that’s all bollocks anyway. They just want to keep his wages down and / or get some compen if someone else wants him. It will be full of get out clauses and they’ll sack him in a heartbeat if we keep sliding down the table.

  51. Chuck: I am watching “being Liverpool” and Rodgers fills their heads with so much tactics and shite, I am surprised they even know there is a ball.

  52. worky, i know it’s not worth a toss, his contract, the whole sorry episode was another of the boards, lets butter up the natives, then hit them with the wonga bombshell, then when that didn’t work, pull the st james’ park name, out of the hat.

    they are just going to make themselves and us, look like a bunch of cnuts, yet again, because this will turn into one monumental balls up.
    because pardew has took them as far as he can, but if he gets the sack, there will be some other poor sucker, on his uppers, who will be only too willing to step into the breach.
    then again, as long as the appointed stooge has the squad, playing something approximating football, would it be a bad thing?

    the first goal today, was straight out of the pardew management handbook, which must be thinner, than the chronic’s thursday jobs pull out supplement.

  53. GS says:

    “Chuck: I am watching “being Liverpool” and Rodgers fills their heads with so much tactics and shite”

    Arguably better than just filling their heads with shite as a certain SHS manages to do!

  54. To conclude, the three points are ours we now lie in 10th place and I’m willing to bet that is probably where we’ll finish at the end of this season cos these Thursday/Sunday games are killing us :)

  55. GS, No worries.

    Though I’d like your thoughts on what Pardew said on Sky Sports.

    “We haven’t had many breaks this season”…

  56. If you think Pardew’s bad, I’ve just been reading some choice Brendan Rodgersism’s. That gadgie is just stuck so far up his own arse that the fire brigade and a whole team of surgeons would be of no help whatsoever in extricating him from himself.

  57. Andymac? SHS? Shearer Headed Supremo. ‘Cos I think Shearer was pretty crap at that manergering stuff as well?

  58. Just watched the game!
    How lucky can we get ?
    Hell started out like gangbusters, looked like it would end up a basketball score.
    The gradually reverted to same old crap.
    By the second half, it was obvious our CB’s could’nt handle Lukaku, Bobby Moore looked more like Demi Moore, i dont even wanna mention the other guy.
    FFS why was Taylor on the bench ?
    No one covered themselves with glory to-day, though proved a point i make, Shola plays a good second striker role.
    And Why would any club play Jonas as a winger ?
    Our super sub (Perch) had one of his worst days ever, who does he think he is Tiote, cause he took a lot of dumbass fouls.
    Hey a lotta credit to a well drilled West Brom side, who’s manager was smart enough to analyze what was needed to the point they were the better side in the second half.
    Breaking up our attempts to carry the ball out, to the point we reverted to hoofball, making every ball 50/50
    I really dont see us making much progress as long as Walter Winterbottom remains in control, erm ! thats another eight years.
    While most teams have improved, we are heading in the opposite direction and will no doubt have clubs coming after our star players, but that may well be what Ashley wants, big bucks.
    Hell we can raid the French clubs again.

  59. GS says:
    October 28, 2012 at 7:33 pm

    “Andymac? SHS? Shearer Headed Supremo. ‘Cos I think Shearer was pretty crap at that manergering stuff as well?”

    GS, it takes me hours to sort out his match previews, changing all the Pardwhos to Pardews the “RBDs” (Red Bin Dippers) to Liverpool, “SAF at OT” to “Sir Alex Ferguson at Old Trafford” and so on. The list is practically endless! :-)

  60. I hear you on Rodgers, but what do you know about what goes on in most dressing rooms, mostly the same phony motivational bullshit that even twelve year olds would smile at.
    The difference is we hear it on tv, on that embarrassing documentary about Liverpool.
    No doubt there are sensible managers who talk to their sides in a sensible manner.
    But a big part of getting sides up for a game is a motivational talk, which happened even with SBR and Morinho.

  61. Why was Fergie so successful and Paisly, with nonsense like football is more important than life, or whatever the Feck the term was he coined.
    Face it alotta football players buy it, there are not exactly that many Phd’s in most teams.
    Just listen to Pardew that should proves my point.

  62. Worky
    I dont get it, what do you have to do to abreviations and name changing ?
    Cant you just leave that to those reading, i mean i’m still not sure what LOL means.

  63. Chuck @130: what? That was supposedly Shankly and Lombardy in harmony/simultaneously. that said “winning isn’t everything, it is the only thing”

    Here’s a quote from Shankly though:

    “Some people believe football is a matter of life and death,…I can assure you it is much more important than that”

    And…

    “Of course I didn’t take my wife to see Rochdale as an anniversary present, it was her birthday, and anyway, it was Rochdale reserves”

  64. chuck says:
    October 28, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    “Why was Fergie so successful and Paisly, with nonsense like football is more important than life, or whatever the Feck the term was he coined.”

    That was Bill Shankly Chuck, not Bob Paisley. Paisley had no pretensions whatsoever and was incredibly modest when he talked about himself and football.

    As for the Shankly statement you referred to above (on Liverpool and Everton supporters), here’s the full thing in context:

    “I’ve seen supporters on Merseyside going to the ground together, one wearing red and white and the other blue and white, which is unusual elsewhere. You get families in Liverpool in which half support Liverpool and the other half Everton. They support rival teams but they have the same temperament and they know each other. They are unique in the sense that their rivalry is so great but there is no real aggro between them. This is quite amazing.

    “I am not saying they love each other. Oh, no. Football is not a matter of life and death… it’s much more important than that. And it’s more important to them than that. But I’ve never seen a fight at a derby game. Shouting and bawling… yes. But they don’t fight each other. And that says a lot for them.”

  65. Oh well: I am reading “private eye” “mediaballs”:

    Anne Robinson asks:

    “which Scotsman discovered penicillin in 1928”

    their Answer:

    “Alexander Graham Penicillin”

  66. Here’s another one:

    How many English Kings have been named Henry?

    Answer:

    I know there was a Henry the Eighth..er…three.

  67. Worky @135: what I said was correct, you didn’t have to correct me! Are you a f@cking school teacher or something?

    It’s your blog though.

  68. Chill GS here’s some more for you !

    Anne Robinson: Name the doctor who founded children’s homes and orphanages in Britain in the 19th century.

    Contestant: Dr Doolittle.

    AR: What ‘R’ is the westernmost island of the British Isles?

    Contestant: Argyll.

    AR: Vietnam has land borders with Laos and Cambodia and which other country?

    Contestant: (after long pause) America.

    AR: What item of photographic equipment has the same name as the private chamber of a judge?

    Contestant: Tripod.

    AR: Which activity, which can be primary, secondary, higher, further or adult, is mainly conducted in schools or universities?

    Contestant: Pass.

    AR: In the City of London, the Monument commemorates which 17th-century event?

    Contestant: Er … the First World War?

    AR: Which month in the Gregorian calendar is named after Augustus Caesar?

    Contestant: June.

    AR: What ‘Z’ is used to describe a human who has returned from the dead?

    Contestant: Unicorn.

    AR: What name is given to the field of medicine that concerns the health of women?

    Contestant: Womenology.

    AR: The ‘Hallelujah Chorus’ occurs in which oratorio by Handel?

    Contestant: The Sound of Music.

    AR: What is the more common name given to the government department ‘Military Intelligence Six’?

    Contestant: MI5.

    AR: Which Conservative MP twice stood unsuccessfully for the leadership of the Conservative Party, against William Hague and Iain Duncan Smith?

    Contestant: (after much thought) Ken Livingstone.

    AR: A pain in the muscles or bones of the lower legs, often suffered by sportsmen is known as Shin…?

    Contestant: …dler’s List.

    AR: Mount Everest is in the autonomous Chinese region of Tibet and which other country?

    Contestant: Nicaragua.

    AR: In which city is the Scottish Parliament situated?

    Former member of Boyzone: London.

    AR: After Guernsey, Jersey, and Alderney, what is the next largest of the Channel Islands?

    Jodie Marsh: Er … is England a Channel Island?

    AR: Which humorous poet is famous for such poems as ‘Oh! I Wish I’d Looked After Me Teeth’ and ‘They Should Have Asked My Husband’?

    Contestant: Tennyson.

    AR: The title ‘Countess’ is given to the wife of which rank of the British nobility?

    Contestant: Queen.

    AR: Single combat is a fight between how many people?

    Contestant: One person.

    AR: What ‘H’ is a common variety of bean used to make baked beans?

    Contestant: Heinz.

    AR: King Priam was associated with which besieged city?

    Contestant: Newcastle.

    AR: Which Island in the Indian Ocean was named after the date of its discovery, the 25th of December 1643?

    Contestant: Guam?

    AR: Which prison shipped out the last of its inmates in 1963?

    Contestant: Australia.

    AR: What letter of the alphabet sounds exactly like the name of a female sheep?

    Andy Roddick: Baa.

  69. GS says:

    “Worky @135: what I said was correct, you didn’t have to correct me! Are you a f@cking school teacher or something?”

    No but he’d like to have been :)

  70. GS says:

    “Andymac @122: thanks for the Spain stuff, but who said you could “conclude””

    You’re welcome and I did ! I was, after all, called by a higher authority :)

  71. AndyMac says:
    October 28, 2012 at 10:52 pm

    “AR: Which humorous poet is famous for such poems as ‘Oh! I Wish I’d Looked After Me Teeth’ and ‘They Should Have Asked My Husband’?”

    Seriously, every single time I go to the dentist and they’re drilling away or whatever, I hear Pam Ayres in my head reciting that daft poem in that daft West Country accent of hers. It’s hardwired in my brain so I definitely wouldn’t get that question wrong. I first heard it on “That’s Life” when I was a bairn.

  72. AndyMac: I was picking an internet fight and thought I knew exactly who to pick it with, but W-ticket has calmed down recently.

    I am hard me, like. Internet hard.

  73. Isn’t it funny that the Southern Shite commentaterer manages to put an “r” in Lukaku’s name = Lukarku

    Thanks for the highlights.